


We Are the Fallen

by madmadamek



Category: Avengers, Doctor Who, Marvel, Roski - Fandom, Thor - Fandom
Genre: AU, F/M, crossover ship, ragey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-14
Updated: 2013-03-14
Packaged: 2017-12-05 07:40:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/720527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madmadamek/pseuds/madmadamek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After separation and upon learning that Rose was deposited once again in the parallel world with but a mere copy of the Doctor, in a rage Loki demands to be released so that he may return to her in his powerless form, insisting on this banishment.  Rose and Loki learn once more to be together and attempt to forget their pasts and struggle to start a life together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Rage of a Fallen God

How long had it been now? Days? Weeks? Months? He had lost all concept of time here in his own special cage, constructed especially for him. His not-brother had brought him back here to Asgard where Odin promptly took away his power. 

He was nothing more now than a failure, not even a failed god. He was nothing. Hardly anyone spoke to him. Thor came to stare at him with that same angry and sad glare and then leave without a word. Frigga came but he could not bring himself to look at her, not desiring to see the sadness in her eyes. Odin had not been to see him since he was brought back. All his former companions came by, but there was disappointment and malice in their gazes. 

It seemed to Loki that he had become a mixture between war criminal and some animal in a cage that people had to come stare at from time to time. He avoided their gazes, loathing them and their animosity but—above all else—loathing the broken thing he had become. 

Not a God, or demi-god, or even a frost giant; he was hardly a man at this point. He had nothing and no one, and it was this loneliness that was slowly crushing him from within. He would not show it, however; he had to cling to something and right now his ego was all he possessed.

Everything had gone so wrong. His life had forever been a lie. In his anger he had destroyed everything and fallen.

Strange to say, however, that the fall had actually proved to be a blessing, for he was saved by a golden woman.

_Rose._

The memory of that name alone was enough to cause an ache in his chest. She had never been his, not even in the smallest measure, but oh how terribly he missed her. A smile that could light the heavens, a warm heart, and a gentle touch—it was enough to melt the coldest heart as it surely had melted his own.

Doubtless she was out there somewhere, traversing the stars with that mad Doctor and his magical blue box.

He shut off his line of thoughts immediately, refusing to think on it. He dare not dwell on what he could not have. It would only make him angry again. 

He was so tired of being angry, and he was angry at everything and everyone. He was angry at Odin, at Thor, those Avengers, at the whole of Asgard, the Frost Giants......at Rose and the man who stole her from him.

Loki hit the side of his cage, so very like the one S.H.E.I.L.D. had built for him, and cursed to himself, the sound ringing down the dark corridor that ran alongside. 

“Oh, hello.”

The voice startled Loki, causing him to turn sharply in the direction of it, to find a very non-Asgardian looking man in the strangest set of clothing; clothes he’d seen elderly men of Midgard wearing. 

Loki glanced around wondering where this man had come from and noticed Thor coming up behind the man, followed by a strange woman with flaming red hair. He spared a glance at Thor and then turned back to the man with the bow-tie. 

“Who is this?” He asked, his question aimed at Thor as he eyed the strange man.

Thor said nothing, the man—though there was something eerily not human about him—spoke up.

“I’m the Doctor!” He announced cheerily.

Doctor. Loki held back an urge to flinch and sneer at the name, then looked the man over. He had seen a picture of Rose’s Doctor and this was not him.

“ _The_ Doctor?” He asked skeptically.

“Oh! So you’ve heard of me, then? I had no idea I was known here, but yes, _the_ Doctor!” 

The ginger woman beside him shook her head and smirked to herself while Thor stood there, silent as stone but eyeing the Doctor curiously.

“No...you are not the Doctor.”

“Well, I was the last time I checked.”

“Well, _Doctor_ , you have the wrong face.” Loki glared, beginning to pace his cage.

“Do i? Goodness, and what face am I supposed to have?”

“Narrow, with wild brown-hair, and you are supposed to wear a suit with a long brown coat.” 

“Oh! Yes, I have regenerated once since then, but I am pretty sure I never met you before. Loki, yes?”

Loki glared over at this Doctor, still skeptical as it to truly being him. “What do you mean _regenerated_?”

“Oh, well, I change my face sometimes. When I am fatally injured and such. This is my eleventh face.”

At this, the woman gave the Doctor a strange look.

Loki ruminated over this explanation, slowly pacing the small space allowed him, glancing warily over at this man and then at the woman. “If what you say is true...she should be here. Where is she?”

“I’m Sorry?” The Doctor looked genuinely confused by this question.

“Where is she? She should be with you. Travelling the skies in your blue box. Where is she?” Loki asked bitterly.

“Oh, well, my companion is Amy.” He turned to the red-head, still perplexed. “Though I have had several companions over the years...i was unaware any of them knew you.”

Loki glared once again over at the man. “This one is not your companion, where is she?”

“Well, I can’t very well say unless you describe her to me, now can i?”

“How can you be so dull?” He snapped, “How could you forget such a companion? When I say ‘she’ only one name should cross your mind!”

“Loki!” Thor thundered warningly.

“No, it’s alright,” The Doctor said to his once brother, “I’ll answer him.” The man turned back to Loki, more seriously this time, his cheery smile faded. “What do you mean, Loki? What companion?”

Loki scoffed, “How could you forget her? Your powerful companion, so unlike any other Midgardian woman.”

“Do you mean River?” The Amy girl prompted, glancing at the Doctor.

Loki groaned in irritation, resuming his pacing, “I mean a woman who burnt like the sun, who destroyed whole armies, who traversed the so-called howling void countless times just to return to you, the man that abandoned her!” He spat. 

A flicker of recognition crossed the Doctor’s face, “Rose...” he near whispered.

“Rose Tyler, the Bad Wolf, a golden goddess you abandoned in a world that was not hers!” Despite his now lack of powers, Loki could feel the icy rage running through his veins.

“I did not abandon her!” The Doctor snapped, composure lost in an instant. 

“You left her in that world, alone.”

“She had her family.”

“She wanted you.”

“I could not get her back.”

“And yet she fought for years to claw her way back to you, a man that dare not try the same.” A bitter laugh escaped his lips now.

“It would have torn the universes, all of them, apart!”

“Yes, but she did it. I saw her go, now where is she? She should be with you.”

“What do you mean you saw her go?” The Doctor’s anger dissipated only just, giving way to confusion.

“When I first fell to Midgard, it was she that found me and took me in. I saw her leave with that damn dimension canon to go back to you. Where is she?”

The Doctor eyed him for a moment, dark shadows flashing across his eyes, a brief show of the so-called Oncoming Storm that Rose had once mentioned. Despite his looks, this was a dangerous man, this Time Lord.

“She returned to that world. I closed the way. It’s where she belongs.”

Loki could feel his blood freezing as his cold anger took hold. He narrowed his eyes at the man through the clear shield of his cage. “You abandoned her. Again? On purpose? After all that fighting she did to return to you, you send her back, unwanted.” His could feel himself shaking with the rage inside him, that bloody desire to destroy once again taking hold. 

He had lost Rose to this man. A man that didn’t want her. It had all been for nothing. They both had lost everything all over again.

“I didn’t abandon her.” The Doctor answered, anger and sorrow both in his voice.

Loki ignored this. He would have no sympathy for this man. “Thor, let me out, I’m leaving.”

“You think after all the damage you caused that we will let you walk free?” Thor asked. 

“I. Am. Leaving! I will not forgive this, Time Lord. You abandoned her twice, you do not deserve her.”

“You are not leaving!” Thor argued.

“I did not abandon her!”

“YOU DROPPED HER IN THAT WORLD AGAIN ON HER OWN!” He shouted, his voice reverberating off the walls of his cell.

“She is not alone.”

“Her family does not—”

“She has me. Well, other me. Metacrisis me.”

“What are you talking about, you worthless creature?”

“Oi!” The red-head growled but once again the Doctor stepped in to explain.

“Well, you see, the last time I regenerated, the time before last, you see. I was still in the early process of it when another alien threat attacked Earth, Midgard, and I had my hand cut off but I grew another. A mad man and a friend apparently kept hold of it and I took it back and left it in the TARDIS. And see, all the stars were going out when Rose came back, so many of my companions showed up, and while me and Rose and Jack were all aboard the Dalek ship, Donna got locked in and when we thought she and the TARDIS were gone she touched my other hand and another me grew out of that. Human-Time Lord meta-crisis, see. Long story. Another me, in other words, was born. Though he was part Donna, you know, part human. He was only part Time Lord and I took them both back to her world.”

After the rather winded explanation that Loki hardly understood a word of, he continued to leer at the Doctor. “A double, then?”

“Yes. See, unlike me, he is human. He can grow old with her, where I cannot.”

“A copy? You give her a mere copy of yourself? A consolation gift? How very _noble_ of you.”

Another glimmer of rage flickered in the Doctor’s eyes at his words. “I was giving her the life she wanted, the one that I could not—”

“You’re a coward.”

“I wouldn’t expect a fallen god to understand what needed to be done.” 

It was a harsh retort but Loki let it bounce off of him. “That makes you no less of a coward. You left her no choice but to take your replica before you flew off.”

“She seemed happy enough to kiss him in front of me.” The Doctor’s voice at this point cracked, whatever memories he had of the moment seeping through.

“And what exactly did you tell her to make this happen?” Loki could see straight through this man now, whatever pretty words he dressed it in, he still abandoned Rose.

For a moment, the Doctor said nothing, his gaze far away but then he met Loki’s icy glare. “Does it need saying.”

“Tell me what you said!” Loki roared.

“I said ‘does it need saying’. That’s what I said.”

Loki was snarling at this man who had downright refused to tell the girl how he felt. “And let me guess, your copy said what you could not.”

The Doctor met Loki glare for glare. “Yes,” he answered, his voice just barely concealing his rage.

Loki laughed cruelly at this before pounding against his cell, “You coward! She could have been yours! But you forced your look-a-like on her!”

“She’ll be happier!”

“HOW DO YOU KNOW?! You swan off and leave them there. A new man, a copy of yourself. You leave them in a world and seal them away where you can never reach like you were throwing them away. You threw her a charming bone and locked her away from you forever. Do you think she will be so happy with a mere double? Even if he did tell her what you could not, I doubt it was more than a temporary happiness. You were her Doctor, not that copy.”

“It had to be—”

“I’m leaving. Thor, release me.”

“You cannot be allowed to leave, Loki. I am sorry, brother, but—”

“I will not hear your false sympathy, just release me. I am unwanted here, it will be better.”

“You cannot be allowed to—”

“I HAVE NO POWER! Or have you forgotten, brother? Odin stripped me of it, I can cause no harm. I am leaving, one way or another, I am. Call it exile if you will but let me go.”  
Thor hesitated, unsure. Loki knew he wanted to go and tell Odin about this but was having second thoughts, hopefully ones that would allow Loki to walk free of this cell and to return to his dear Frost Wolf. 

The Doctor was staring sternly at him but Loki did not bother to look over at him. “You will wreck her happiness.”

“If she is happy.” Loki had to remind him of that. What did this Doctor know? How could he possibly know Rose was happy without him? He knew nothing. He was just a coward as far as Loki could determine.

“And if you find that she is?” The Doctor asked after a space of a few minutes.

Loki could feel his heart drop into his stomach at the thought but kept his face expressionless. “When I have not returned...you will know then.” He now turned to Thor, ignoring the Doctor completely. “Let me go.” He said more calmly.

After a lengthy silence in which the Doctor and his new companion retreated—to where, Loki could care less—Thor opened the cell at last, still appearing uncertain about this decision.

Loki brushed past him and then paused. A mix of emotions swirling inside of him. He had been so angry for so long but now he wasn’t sure what to feel. “You are finally rid of me...brother...”

“You will return if the Midgard woman is happy?”

“Yes.” It was a lie. He was done here. He did not belong here anymore.

~~~  
The fall was not so bad this time but as Thor had quietly assisted him in his departure from Asgard, he was allowed to travel the proper way instead of plummeting through the heavens.

It was not all that hard to decipher where he was. 

He had been out this way a few times with Rose on one of those lazy days he was able to get her out of the lab, driving up and down the coast with her hair whipping about her face, the brightest of smiles on her lips. Such a rare thing, those smiles. He had treasured them. He hoped she would give him one again.

It didn’t take him long to hunt down her flat and Torchwood, observing each from a distance. He would not make himself known until he was certain she was alone and that this double of her Doctor was not with her. 

The moment he saw Rose exit her apartment building, he felt his heart swell with renewed affection. He had forgotten just how much he missed her, and she was so close but he could do nothing but watch. He noted, happily, that she was not with the copy of the Doctor; he was nowhere to be seen.

Loki followed Rose at a distance to a small tea shop, one he had visited with her and her mother what seemed so long ago. He watched as she made her way to a small table, ordering her drink as she glanced around a few times before looking down into her tea, stirring in cream dolefully. Whatever urges he had to go join her, he kept himself hidden.  
Soon a man approached, and there was no doubting who the man in the blue suit was. The duplicate Doctor approached but did not sit, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he looked down at her. Loki was too far to hear what was being said but there was no doubting that they were no longer together. The man was shaking his head and Rose was soon standing, nodding quietly and looking as though she were holding back tears.

It wasn’t long before Rose was breaking down in tears there at the table. Loki wanted to run over to her, hold her, and ask what had happened but he dare not impede on her tears. 

Instead Loki watched as the man turned and walked away, leaving Rose behind. Loki followed this copy of the Doctor, seething with rage, waiting until the man was well away from prying eyes at a park where he stopped to look at nothing in particular. 

Loki ached to hit this man; he strode forward angrily, making himself known.

“You abandoned her again, didn’t you?” He growled.

The Doctor turned questioning to this strangely dressed man. “Excuse me?”

“You left her, once more, in tears! What will your excuse be this time?” Loki snarled. 

“Excuse me but who the hell do you think you are coming to yell at me like this is any of your business?” The Doctor retorted just as harshly.

“When you left her on that beach of tears, she fought her way back to you, and then you dump her with this copy!” Loki raged. “AND YOU LEAVE HER AGAIN?!” Now he had hold of the man’s lapels. 

“Loki, isn’t it?” The Doctor asked suddenly, eyes level, unaffected by Loki’s rage.

“What is your excuse now?” Loki asked, shaking with anger.

“I’m not the same. I am not him.”

“You are all she has.” 

The Doctor looked ready to shout but his tone cracked, “We didn’t have a choice. I’m not...”

“So you leave her?”

“Yes.”

Loki’s fury was at its limit, he hated this man with every fiber of his being. “You abandoned her,” he growled. “Three times.” It was unforgivable. “Do you know nothing but how to break her heart?”

The Doctor looked ready to take any punishment this fallen god would offer. Both feeling a similar pain. “I guess not.”

Loki held no sympathy for this man. He wanted to rage at him forever, to make him pay for hurting Rose repeatedly. His hands gripped the Doctor’s collar so tightly that his knuckles were blue, truly blue. He could feel the monster in himself rise, ready to end this man—but he released him. Had he gone through with it, he knew Rose would not forgive it, and one thing he refused to be responsible for, were Rose’s tears. 

With a final glare at the Doctor, Loki turned and left.

~~~  
It was a week later that Loki found himself standing at the hill overlooking the beach that had often haunted Rose’s dreams. He had at long last come to find her here, watching the cold waves crash on the shore. It was where she always came when her depression got the best of her, a silent wish that her doctor would return to her there but now she had come to say goodbye, he thought. 

He didn’t approach right away, giving her the moment to herself. When she turned to walk back up the beach, Loki started down to meet her. It took her a moment, as she braced herself against the chill in the air, her head down as she started up the slope, but when she lifted her head at last, she stopped. 

From the look on her face, it was clear to him that she didn’t quite believe what she was seeing, “Loki?” She asked, unsure.

“Rose.” He refrained from smiling entirely, not wanting to get his hopes up.

“It’s you?”

“Yes.”

They stared at each other in silence, letting the reality sink in before Rose started slowly forward, stopping in front of him to reach her hand to his face. “You’re really here.”

“I am.”

All at once, she was in his arms and he enveloped her in his embrace, tears tumbling from her eyes. “You came back.”

“Rose, as long as you need me, not even gods will keep me away.”


	2. Picking Up the Peices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Rose attempt to return to normalcy and then have it out when Rose learns he confronted the Doctor

It had not been the triumphant return he was hoping for. Instead of that ever bright smile that he had dreamed of since her leaving, he had received tears as she fell into his arms. Words of joy at his return and dire sadness at her recent loss of love assaulted him as she wept; all he could do was hold her.

Their trip back had been awkward and silent at first, though eventually Rose was able to offer him softer smiles. When they had stopped for the night at a hotel, he had woken in the middle of the night to find her curled against him, gentle tears falling and then fading away as she fell asleep beside him.

Upon returning to the flat he had remembered spending his days moping and recovering, he found it littered with boxes and crates, ready for a move. His room had been somewhat converted into storage, some of the boxes labeled “The Doctor” were quickly removed to the living room. 

They spent the next few days together as they always had which, he supposed, was a comfort but there was so much left unsaid between them. The Doctor’s name was all but forbidden; Loki never uttered the name but he would catch Rose talking about something or other when she would say it out of the blue and then fall quiet. There was nothing he hated more than those petulant silences, furious that the Doctor still managed to grieve her when he was supposed to be gone and—yet again—Loki was left to pick up the pieces.

He longed for these moments to pass, for a time when the Doctor was a distant memory and Rose was free of whatever spell he had put her under. Until then, however, they would have to cope.

Loki found himself on her balcony late one evening, lost in thought about what had transpired during his time away. He’d have to tell her eventually of the terrible deeds he had done, of how he led an army into Midgard—not hers—and waged war in the metropolis of New York against the Avengers. The prospect of admitting these transgressions did not please him but he could not be silent on it forever.

He heard a door close inside the apartment, alerting him to the fact that Rose had come home. As he knew she would, Rose soon joined him on the balcony, staring out at nothing in particular.

“Hey,” she said by way of greeting.

“Welcome home,” he said, looking over at her now, “And how was work?”

“Oh, I’d rather not talk about work right now. I’m sick of work. How was your day?”

“Nothing special, I’m afraid. Thinking, mostly.”

“You do that an awful lot, don’t you?”

“Is there something wrong with that?” He asked curiously, leaning against the rail of the balcony.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that. I was just curious. What do you think about?”

“Asgard. You. Those are my primary thoughts.”

“You think about me, do you?” She asked cheekily, her tongue pressed against her teeth; that was the smile he remembered.

“All the time,” he admitted.

A moment of silence passed between them, the subject of his thoughts about her weighing heavily. Perhaps it was just not yet time to think about such things.

“I had thought you would still be here.”

Loki turned to Rose, confused by her statement. “I am here.”

She shook her head almost sadly, “No, I mean...after I left. I didn’t expect to come back but when we—when I did, you were gone. There was nothing here except a mess.”

Loki’s features darkened, remembering the day she had left. An overwhelming loneliness had shaken him. Just when he thought he was getting better, she had left him. He had wrecked half the apartment following her departure, shredding images of the Doctor and tearing up images of their time together. Madness had consumed him. He had wanted nothing more than to rip his heart from his chest and never feel again. He had howled at the stars, cursing them for having stolen her from him, uncaring that the sky was going black. What had any of it mattered without her?

It was as though he had lost his home all over again and left with nothing but anger and pain and regret.

He scowled deeply at the memory. 

“Where did you go?” Rose prompted again, shaking him from his thoughts.

“Away,” he answered.

“Where, though?”

“Just... _away_ ,” he stressed.

Rose bit her lip anxiously, “I know you were upset...”

“ _Upset_?” He asked, turning to her in disbelief at the simple word. “I was reeling. I practically begged you not to leave...and you left me anyway.” 

“I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“But you did, Rose. I...I needed you.” He never thought he’d be admitting these things. The truth was that, however. He _had_ needed her. She brought him comfort and companionship and she accepted him for who he was. It did not matter to her that he was a Frost Giant; she stayed by his side until that fateful day that left him aching.

“I had to go. It was—”

“ _It was important._ I know...but it only hurt you in the end, did it not? You were abandoned here _again_.” Once more, he could feel his temper rising, loathing the thought of _that man_. “I told you it would. He hurt you.”

“It’s not his fault!” Rose snapped.

“Yes it is!” He countered furiously. “He abandoned you, Rose! How many times must he shatter your heart before you see it? How many tears must you shed before you understand that he is the cause of all your sadness? That is all he will ever be!”

“Stop it!” Rose shouted, tears shimmering in her eyes.

“The truth hurts, Rose. Trust me. No one knows better than I, how much the truth hurts but it _is_ the truth! He abandoned you and that’s all he knows. You deserve better.”

“That’s not—”

“I would never abandon you, Rose.”

She fell silent as he stood there looking at her, waiting for her to respond.

“Loki...I—”

“I would _never_ abandon you,” he stressed again. He had to make her see that he was nothing like that man. That unlike the mad Doctor, Loki would fight to be with her no matter what.

“I’m not—it’s not—” Rose floundered, trying to find some excuse to forgo the conversation. “I just lost him, Loki. I’m not...ready.”

“Rose, I am not asking for anything more than for you to understand and to see the truth. He abandoned you three times.”

“It wasn’t his fault that I got trapped here!”

“A powerful man like him could have found a way across the realms to get back to you! You certainly did, just as I did so I could return to you. He made no such effort! He was content to leave you here! He brought you back and gave you a mere copy of himself!”

He could tell that Rose was ready to shout at him but instead she stared at him, “Hang on, how did you know?”

“What does it matter? He abandoned you!”

“No, tell me. How do you know about that?”

Loki looked away. He knew this would come up eventually, he only hoped it would have been brought up later. “I met him in Asgard.”

Rose blinked in surprise. “In Asgard? When?”

“I was...taken back to Asgard. He appeared there and we had a little _chat_.”

She stared at him, mulling over his words. “And then what?”

“I came to find you.”

“If you knew I was with him, his metacrises, then why?”

“I was not convinced you were happy. I had to see for myself...and I was right.”

“Loki, had you been spyin’ on me?”

“I only found you upon my return, and I watched him walk away.”

“You didn’t follow me about?” She asked.

“No, I followed him.”

He knew the moment he said it, that he should have kept his mouth shut. Her eyes narrowed at him suspiciously, “You followed him?”

“He should never have left you.”

“What did you do, Loki?”

“I said what needed to be said,” he answered coolly.

“You confronted him?”

“Yes! Outing him as the coward he is.”

“You had no _right_!” She shouted.

“Rose, he—!”

“I know what he did, Loki! And I say I have a right better idea of what he did, than you. It was none of your business!”

Loki drew himself up to his full height, towering over her. “How was I to let it pass?”

“You just should have done! You don’t know what happened, Loki! It’s been a year!”

“How has it been a year? It has been mere months since you left.”

Rose sighed, forcing back her frustration. “The realms, as you call them, run at different times. For me it has been a year. We tried for a year. You have no idea what we have been through in that time and even if you did, it is not your place to come in have it out with him.”

“He still abandoned you.”

“It was mutual, Loki. We were fallin’ apart for some time.”

“You were crying!” He argued. “And he just walked away!”

“Of course I was crying! I loved him! I still—” she sighed. 

“Why?!” He snapped. “How can you still defend his actions?”

“What does it matter?!” She countered. “What was between me and him is none of your concern!”

At this Loki seethed; rage flooding his chest. He wanted to howl at the injustice of it all, even now the Doctor taunted him. Even though he had walked out on her, she would defend him. “ARGH!” He roared, swinging his fist at the plant sitting on the ledge beside him, sending it hurdling toward the ground.

“LOKI!”

“I will not apologize for defending you!” He shouted, rounding on her. “I refuse to apologize for that!”

Rose inhaled sharply. “Loki...you can’t just...”

“I merely called him a coward. I could have hurt him—I wanted to—but I did not. I called him by his rightful name and left.” Loki moved forward, taking her face in his hands. “You deserve better. I may be a failure of a god but I am no weak-hearted fool.”

Rose did not respond immediately, letting him pull her into an embrace. She sighed into his white cotton shirt. “We argued about you.”

“Hmm?” He hummed curiously.

“Me and...the Doctor, we argued about you.”

“Oh?” He asked casually, trying to not sound too happy about this little fact.

“Yeah. Often.” She didn’t elaborate and Loki didn’t ask her to. As if sensing the smile he was holding back, she slugged him gently in the stomach. “It’s not funny.”

“To you.” He smirked playfully now.

Unwittingly, Rose smiled back at him. “You’re terrible.”

He smiled wider, “I never said I wasn’t. God of mischief remember?”

“God or no, I’ll still smack you.”

Loki beamed. This was his Rose, all smiles and cheekiness. Gods he had missed it. He felt his heart lighten, his rage falling away. With her he was better and perhaps in time, hoped she would allow him to do the same for her.


	3. Fault Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor comes to get the remainder of his things only to find Loki in her flat. The pair have an argument that soon escalates and only stops when Rose returns. Another argument bubbles between Loki and Rose.

Loki was getting tired of lazing about Rose’s flat, if truth be told. He supposed he’d eventually have to get a job, most likely with Torchwood, but he was not yet ready. Too much had happened and he was thankful for Rose’s patience on the matter. 

He was still adjusting to life here in Midgard—Earth, as he now had to remind himself to call it—and to the fact that he was stuck here forever. Sometimes the idea maddened him and he would fly into a sudden rage out of pure frustration. Unfortunately this had resulted in a few broken pieces of furniture that ended with Rose giving him the verbal beat-down of his life where he then shouted back before pulling away.

It was a wonder she put up with him at these times but was even better that she could hold her own against him. This always gave him a mingled sense of pride and regret. He did not enjoy yelling at her but there were those moments when his seething darkness would wash over him without warning, leaving him restless with anger. There was nothing he wanted more than to make this stop. It frightened him how angry he could get sometimes and he never wanted to let it loose on her.

There was still so much darkness in him and it left an icy pool in the pit of his stomach. Rose’s smile was enough to ease the pain but there were days he could hardly be reached. Anger still remained in his heart about Asgard and Thor and Odin; he knew there was almost no hope of reconciling it regardless of his wishes. He felt so helpless, now more than ever. He had no power, he was no God, he was a fallen and pitiful little monster made man—and he was hardly even that. 

It was frustrating to know he had to make a life here on Midgard; an unextraordinary existence, pretending to be human. It was hard to cope but he tried. He wanted to try; for Rose as well for himself. Sometimes he got up to make breakfast, failing miserably at the attempts but Rose smiled that smile of hers and taught him. He did whatever chores she asked as best as he could manage and tried to do a few good things here and there to make her smile, just like he used to when he first came to be with her. He hoped he was doing better now that he was not off moping in his room for days on end.

Lately, however, Loki spent time packing, seeing as Rose couldn’t seem to bring herself to do it. She had planned to move from this place into another flat her mother found once it had opened up; there were too many unwanted memories here, she had told him. It pained him to still see her think on that man but was gladdened by the fact that she had asked him if he wanted to join her in the move. Loki, of course, accepted.

So Loki took care packing their things, shunting the dusty boxes labeled “The Doctor” out of the way irritably as he passed them every day, making them now appear as though they’d been dropped from the top of the building—which Loki had indulged himself in one afternoon when the Doctor had left a message on her answering machine. Something about how he was ‘so so sorry’. Loki had resisted the urge to toss the machine off the building and into the street as well but without his powers, he couldn’t very well get away with the act. He settled for subtly erasing the message before Rose got home.

Just as Loki was loading up another box, he heard the sound of keys in the door. He dropped what he was doing and headed straight for the entrance, knowing that Rose couldn’t very well be home yet. He peered through the keyhole, a growl forming in his throat as he unlocked the door and opened it to reveal a now startled Doctor.

For a moment, neither of them moved, staring at each other—rather Loki glared while the Doctor stared dumbfounded by the ex-god’s presence. Then, after the wild-haired Doctor freed his keys from the lock, he leveled his gaze back at Loki.

“What are you doin’ here? This is Rose’s flat.”

“I am well aware. And I live here, if you must know.” Loki did his best to remain expressionless, holding back that desire to smile smugly at the look of absolute astonishment on the Doctor’s face.

“You—since when?”

“I fail to see how that is any of your business, _Doctor_ ,” Loki replied, enjoying having this edge over the Doctor.

“Moving in on her already now that’s she’s vulnerable. That’s pathetic.” 

Loki wanted to laugh at the Doctor’s retort, “Oh, I did no such thing. Rose asked me to stay. I am merely picking up the pieces you left behind when you broke her heart for the third time.”

The Doctor was practically snarling at him, “You are nothing more than a troublesome God, thinking it fun to play around with a mortal girl as though she’s yours. I know how you tried to make her stay behind with you.”

“She would have been better off, do you not agree? Instead you abandoned her again with this pitiful copy that would also leave. Who is the pathetic one now, Doctor?”

“You are doing this out of spite!”

“Well, of course I am; that’s half the fun.” Loki was smiling now, enjoying the rage on the other man’s face. At long last, he was the threat and he was winning.

“You are dangerous and a detriment to her safety! If you feel anything for her, you’ll leave. You will only hurt her!”

“Hark, is this the cat calling the kettle black? You have had your chance, Doctor and you failed thrice. The difference between us is that I would never hurt her.” 

The Doctor’s fists were clenched into fists, rage filling his eyes; it was alarming how much they were alike but Loki did not flinch.

“Leave her. You can claim you care for her all you like but these games will only end with her getting hurt,” the Doctor growled.

“What do you care for a heart you have already trampled on? You have no right to barge in here trying to be her champion.”

“I still love her!”

“As do I but the difference is that you left. You cannot simply come running back when you realize she won’t spend her life pining after you.” It amazed Loki how calm he could be now, watching as the Doctor seethed and fell apart. 

“I won’t let you—”

“Won’t let me _what_ exactly? Give her the love she deserves? Happiness? Stability? What?!”

“Stability? You? God of Mischief? That’s a laugh!”

At this Loki grabbed the Doctor by the shirt, the Doctor doing likewise, the two of them glaring daggers at each other.

“I can give her everything that you cannot,” Loki growled.

The Doctor smirked, “A monster can give her nothing.”

Loki flooded with rage, feeling the ice fill his veins and eyes grow hard; he raised his fist to strike, the Doctor pulling his own fist back.

“LOKI! DOCTOR! STOP!”

The scream pierced Loki’s thoughts, the anger abating in shock as he let the other man go. His eyes met the blazing brown ones of his beloved Rose; oh, she was in a fine fury. 

Rose stood there, arms crossed, a fierce glare flitting over both men.

“What are you two _doin’_?!” She asked waspishly.

Neither deigned to answer; each ashamed for having lost their cool but even more so for having been caught.

“What are you even doin’ here?” She asked, now glaring fully at the Doctor.

“I came to get my things but—”

“Then get them an’ go!” She snapped, her voice cracking this time.

The Doctor looked ready to say something, caught between angry and sad as he looked back at her, but then turned around gathering the remaining boxes and left.

Rose closed the door sharply before turning to glare through shimmering tears at Loki.

“Rose...”

“No, don’t you dare try to come up with an excuse. Don’t you dare,” she warned, her voice quivering. Loki closed his mouth, longing to say something but, hating the look on her face, decided to not speak. “I can’t believe you,” she continued, close to tears. “You had to go an’ start a fight...”

“I didn’t start the fight!”

The look she gave him let him know that she didn’t buy that for an instant. “You were goin’ to just hit him an’ get into a stupid fist-fight. You are both just giant...” she pursed her lips together trying to come up with the proper word to describe just how stupid she found him, “....you’re just...stupid! Big stupid gods with stupid superiority complexes an’ have to fight like the stupid _prats_ you both are!”

Loki lowered his head, holding his breath, hating that he had managed to upset her yet again.

“I just can’t believe you would so something like that!”

“ _Rose_...”

“Don’t _Rose_ me, you giant pain in the arse!”

“I am sorry, Rose.”

“And don’t use those words!”

Loki sighed heavily, knowing that he had really crossed a line this time. If only that Doctor hadn’t shown up.

“Why did you do it?”

“You know how I feel about how he treated you,” he replied stiffly.

“And it is still none of your damn business. You have no right!”

“He was the one who came barging into the flat!”

“He came to get his things!”

“Well, he didn’t have to be rude about it!”

“I very much doubt that he was the only one bein’ rude!

“Then you admit he’s rude?”

“Of course he’s rude! He’s always been ruddy _rude_!”

Loki ran his hands through his hair in frustration, “Then why are you only having a go at me?!”

“Don’t you dare turn this on me! I know what you were on about; and don’t even try to deny it!”

“I only—”

“I know, had a _chat_ , right?”

“I could have done worse.”

“Oh, like you were gonna do just as I walked in? That it?”

“No! Yes—I—Rose—”

“You can’t go about usin’ your powers on him, Loki! He’s human!”

“SO AM I!”

Silence fell between them, Rose’s eyes wide with surprise. “What do ya mean?”

“I’m...” Loki felt his heart drop into his stomach, turning away from her, “My power was taken...I’m just...a twisted, broken man...”


	4. Sins and Bedroom Hymns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki comes clean about New York. Anger and reconciliation that brings them closer together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This gets NSFW, you have been warned

An aching silence settled over them after that statement. He could feel her gentle probing gaze at his back but he could not bring himself to face her just yet. He had just admitted to being mortal, human nearly—though he hardly thought himself that much—but what was sure to follow would be an admission to his recent crimes against humanity. 

This could not end well. Admitting his weakness and about to expose his secrets, was he really about to lay himself bare? 

He waited for her to speak, not daring to initiate the subject he did not want to speak of.

“Loki...what do you mean your power was taken? What happened?”

Her gently voiced question did not make this easier to admit. He exhaled slowly, still not turning to look at her; he didn’t want to see her anger and disappointment when he told her what he had done.

“After you left,” he started solemnly, swallowing back the well of emotion that was already threatening its way up his throat, “...it all fell apart. I was lost and angry when you found me...and I was lost and angry when you left.”

He felt Rose draw nearer, reaching out to him but he pulled away, he could not take her sympathy knowing what he was about to reveal to her. He feared her reaction more than he ever feared her leaving him.

“I’m sorry,” she said, sounding sincere.

He shook his head, “I was so furious, Rose; you saw what I left behind, did you not? Everything I destroyed?” He saw her nod out of the corner of his eye before he continued. “That was nothing compared to what I did next. My heart grew cold again without you here. I left and I plotted, waiting to exact my revenge on Odin and Thor and Midgard.”

“What are you sayin’, Loki? I thought you wanted to go back to Asgard and your brother.”

Loki felt a pang in his chest and the word ‘brother’, wincing at it, “He is no longer my brother and...I could not go back.”

“But you said you were taken back...” 

“Yes...but not until after I tried to lay waste to the metropolis of New York.”

At this he heard a sharp intake of breath, “Loki...what...?”

“Not in this realm...another. I took a prototype of your canon to leave here. There was nothing left for me here, all I had left was anger.”

“You...did this...because I left?” 

He could hear the edge of anger back in her voice; the pang in his chest sharpened. “You were the only thing holding me together, Rose.”  
“So it’s my fault then?” She asked sharply.

“No!” This time he turned to face her, a pained expression on his face. “But I had nothing left, Rose. It was like I lost _everything_ all over again! I wanted you and you were gone to a place I could never reach with a man I could never be. And Asgard would never take me back. I was unwanted by everyone I have ever loved, so I took it out on Midgard. I had aligned myself with the Chitauri and gained an army.”

“You _invaded_?” The tears shimmered in her eyes, loathing that he had done something she had fought and prevented so many times with that Doctor of hers. 

“Yes...and I lost.”

“That doesn’t excuse it! How many people died, Loki? How many died because of you?”

He averted his gaze, “...several...I know not the number of casualties.”

She huffed in disgust. “I can’t believe you did that.”

Loki turned away from her, pained by the fury in her voice, “Thor and his companions won. I was... _muzzled_...and taken back to Asgard where Odin took my power from me and locked me away in a cage all my own.” 

Rose did not respond to him immediately which made him glance over at her. She was still scowling but not looking at him, traces of tears rolling down her cheeks. He had finally managed to hurt her, the one thing he swore he would never do. What a wretched thing he was.

“Caged like a dangerous animal. I suppose you’d think it appropriate? I am just a killer. Not Asgardian, not Jotun, not even hardly a man. I am nothing anymore. Powerless. Weak. Nothing.” His hands balled into fists, furious at his own pitiful existence; loathing the thing he had become. Suddenly he began pacing, restless with feeling; so much emotion welling in him that he feared he’d come apart at the seams from the intensity of it all. 

“Hated by all, that is my lot now,” he fumed, “Stripped of everything that I am and caged. Now I have gone and hurt you—am I good for nothing anywhere? What am I? What am I good for? I am nothing now!” He shouted.

He hated this, he thought he’d had control, especially now that he was back with her, the one place he thought he belonged—but that wasn’t true was it? He was not even human, he was a powerless monster who had merely escaped its cage; a lost and broken thing wandering aimlessly in this world that was not his own. 

It was only the third time it had happened that he could remember, and each time brought on by heartache. Tears were on his cheeks; hot tears on his cool skin. He felt so terribly hopeless and lost. He would lose Rose for this, for how could she forgive him? He should have known. What he’d done—he couldn’t ask her to forgive him for that.

He collapsed on the couch, staring at the floor, his hands covering his head in frustration. He dare not look at the disappointment he knew was on her face, the look he always got, because he was just a terrible broken monster not worthy of love or sympathy from anyone. That’s how it had always been, how could he expect any different here? Now Rose had seen what he was capable of, the terrible things he could do; how could she forgive him? It was a foolish wish and a dream.

All at once he felt a hand on his back, gentle and soothing. He didn’t move, not daring to believe that Rose was comforting him, not understanding how she could. 

“You’re not nothin’—and you’re not hated either,” Rose said, her voice soft. “I don’t hate you.”

“After all I did—”

“I’m not sayin’ it was smart an’ I’m not sayin’ what you did was good but—”

Loki let out a steadying breath, “I do not desire forgiveness. I am not deserving, I know that.”

He felt Rose’s arm slide around his hunched shoulders, holding him gently, another hand resting on his arm. “Don’t say that.”

“What am I, Rose? I have nothing.”

“You have me—” she stopped short, letting herself trail off.

Loki gave her a searching look, “Do I?”

Rose’s eyes watered ever so slightly, giving him a gentle smile, “Yeah.”

A sigh of relief escaped him, “I am—I do not know what I am, Rose. Not a God, not a man—”

“You are you. You are Loki, that’s all that matters. I rather like who you are, even if you can be a pain in the arse.” She smiled genuinely now, kissing his shoulder.

Calming warmth spread through him, at ease at Rose’s touch, he reached his hand over to cover hers, rubbing the back of her knuckles with his thumb before dipping his head to place a soft kiss on her fingers. 

“You were the sun and my world went black without you,” he murmured over her fingertips.

He inclined his head to rest it against hers, meeting her brilliant gaze. A blush spread across her cheeks. In that moment, he could not remember seeing anything more beautiful in his long life, watching as the blush spread from her cheeks to her neck. Unable to resist the urge, he lifted his hand to stroke the side of her cheek with his knuckles, brushing her hair behind her ear.

“You have given me life, Rose.”

Rose let out a shuddering breath, “Loki—”

“Yes?” He asked, sliding his fingers into her hair.

Rose could not answer, unable to find the words, her hand sliding from his arm to his knee. He watched as the tip of her tongue darted out to wet her lips. 

Loki could feel his heart hammering in his chest, almost afraid of what he was seeing. It couldn’t possibly be true, what he was seeing; how could it be? Here he thought she would have forsaken him but here she was accepting him—wanting him. He held her gaze, waiting for a clear sign, he dare not misinterpret her; he wanted it to be right, he wanted to show her how he felt fully and completely and he would not do so by force.

He turned his body ever so slightly, bringing his lips nearer to hers, hoping and praying she would not push him away. “You are undoubtedly the most beautiful woman in all the realms,” he whispered, watching her reaction carefully. Another blush tinted her cheeks, her breath becoming more shallow.

Their breaths mingled in the space between them for a moment before he felt her lips brush against his and his fear fell away. He met her lips eagerly, so soft and tender at first, feeling her hand slide up into his hair, pulling him nearer. He turned more fully toward her, wrapping an arm around her back, slipping his tongue past her lips. 

She tasted of sunlight, he thought; so vibrant and intoxicating. It felt as though he were being filled with glowing warmth that spread from his mouth to fill every fiber of his being. She returned his kisses with fervor, feeling her fingers now twining passionately in his hair as she clung to him. 

He stood suddenly, pulling her up with him, refusing to break the contact. Rose responded immediately, her fingers slipping to the collar of his shirt, deftly unbuttoning him, soon freeing him of the cloth. The feel of her warm fingers sliding across his chest had him sighing into her mouth causing her to smile wickedly before pulling him into a bruising kiss that he returned with interest, colliding with her into the wall nearest to them.

His whole body ached with yearning, lost in the haze of desire that was consuming him, his desire for her burning him from within. Of all the dreams that had assaulted him when in her presence, not one could compare to the reality of having her in his arms, kissing him so hungrily. 

His hands slipped from her hair to her waist, tracing the curve of her hips around to her rear, pressing himself against her. She hummed pleasantly against his lips before tracing his jaw with kisses to his neck where she bit him gently. A low growl emanated deep in his throat. 

All at once he divested her of her blouse, letting it fall haplessly to the floor, his eyes lighting on the tops of her ivory breasts only just concealed beneath the blue lace of her bra. He molded her breasts with both hands watching her reaction, nipping at her bottom lip as she gasped. Such a beautiful sound his ears had never heard before; he wanted more.

Once more he was kissing her, pulling her firmly against him with one hand, the other quickly unhooking her bra, slipping her free. He felt her fingers slip to the hem of his pants, tugging him in the direction of the hallway, he followed without complaint. 

One by one their clothes fell by the wayside, littering the hallway to her room where they tumbled naked into bed, him landing atop her, trailing kisses from her mouth to her neck and down between her breasts before pulling each nipple into his mouth, nipping her ever so gently as she squirmed so wantonly beneath him, whispering his name encouragingly as he continued his downward trek.

He so dearly loved the feel of her flesh against his lips, so silken and perfect, so much better than he expected but what else was to be expected from his golden goddess but perfection? He soon found what he was seeking, the aroma of her sex ever intoxicating like honey and wine. He kissed her intimately, dipping his tongue into her center to hear her gasp his name in response, decidedly the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. 

Before long she was mewling, her gasps more persistent her fingers curling into his hair. He glanced up repeatedly from his task so see her reactions—so wild, so beautiful and needy his Rose was. Oh but he was just as hungry for her, he could wait no longer. 

He raised himself up from her, hearing her whimper with disappointment, meeting his gaze as he crawled back over her. “We are far from finished my beloved,” he whispered, capturing her lips once again feeling her hands at his back, her hips grinding up towards him eagerly, “I want this to last.”

At that moment he slid inside of her, groaning from the velvety sensation that enveloped him, Rose gasping beneath him. At long last he was with her, their bodies molding together in all the right places; he had not dreamed he could find someone to fit so perfectly, a true match; it was as though she were made for him and he her. Cut from the same cloth but divided over the eons and flung far across the realms, at last to be reunited in this ever darkening room. 

A symphony of gasps and whispered words of love accompanied them, filling the room and surrounding them, transplanting them with a warm golden glow as their bodies united again and again, lost forever in euphoric bliss, he and his goddess. 

Their love was timeless and knew no borders, the passion between them unshakable. Untiring, unfaltering as their bodies contorted in bliss. Such blinding unimaginable pleasure filling them. Uttering each other’s names between their gasps and groans; a blissful chant that belonged to only them. Sweat-slicked and desperate, their passion blazed white hot and fervent, their gasps increasing, becoming louder. Just when they thought they could know no greater pleasure it climbed insurmountable heights before—  
They cried out as a wave of rapture washed over them, blinding them as they rode through it with measured thrusts; their final gasps captured in one final desperate kiss before collapsing in each other’s arms.

This was his heaven, he decided. What need had he for Valhalla when he had the warm body of his beloved Rose? Her arms wrapped around him, holding him as she sighed reverently. After a thousand years of life, after all the pain and loneliness—he had finally found his home, and her name was Rose.


	5. Black & Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose and Loki have found a groove now to their new months relationship but there is still one sore spot: the Doctor. Everything goes beautifully until Loki finds something of the Doctor's in his closet and proceeds to use it to anger the Doctor. This results in an explosive confrontation between Loki and the Doctor upon which Rose decides she needs some space. Once more his anger goes too far.

It was not the first time he woke up tangled in silky white sheets, a warm naked body wound around his, nor would it be the last. In fact, he could distinctly remember that this had been going on for the past two months now.

Nights were spent exploring each other’s bodies in the most intimate detail and blissful morning’s spent wrapped around each other in loving silence or talking the way lovers do about anything and everything. Loki never imagined he would be part of just such an existence but he could think of nothing he’d rather be doing just then: lying there, Rose in his arms, a radiant haze filling his thoughts as the sun streamed through the curtains

He remembered a time when he had merely dreamed of even receiving the smallest of her affections; treasuring her smile like something sacred and meant only for him, all the while knowing she would always leave him for another man.

That was all over now. This was the new Loki.

He had been so angry all the time but now it had dissipated for the most part. Rose gave him purpose and joy; made him feel needed and loved. Even when they fought—and boy they could fight so loud he thought that surely even Asgard would hear them—they always settled things. Loki made up by pulling his weight around the house and doing little things for her; Rose made it up to him the way she always did: some chips, perhaps some coffee or tea, and a nice sit down. Once her fury had abated, Rose would listen and they would talk. No issue was too big for them to discuss.

Their rows were nothing out of the ordinary, he supposed; though Loki could never remember having and honest to Gods _relationship_ , so he didn’t have much reference to base it off of other than those insipid romantic comedies she always insisted on watching. Sometimes they fought over silly things, particularly after their move into the new flat, fighting over placement and improvements that had to be made. Mostly, they fought about work.

Torchwood was never an easy place to work, given the demands and the secrecy of the jobs there; the occasional alien threats didn’t help either. Rose was nearly always on call for certain missions, otherwise she was in the lab experimenting on alien technology. Loki—who had at last garnered a job there as well—had become more of a businessman. He was built for politics, given his past. He helped give insight on certain matters, helped run the company, and act as ambassador if need be.

Truth be told, however, Loki had been the one to start most of the arguments. He wanted Rose home more and she wanted him to back off. It was the same old arguments from his last time here. He also hated her going on dangerous missions. At such times, he had a habit of getting possessive and arrogant, demanding that she not go on them. This always granted him a well-earned slap across the face; she and her mother certainly had that in common...though he was certain Rose’s stung more.

The thing they argued about the most...was the Doctor. The infuriating man still worked at Torchwood and, in Loki’s opinion, in too close proximity to Rose. Not that she hung around him too much, in fact it was somewhat rare as the part Time Lord didn’t work there full time. Loki’s issue on the matter wasn’t so much with Rose, though; it was about the looks he often saw the Doctor giving her. It made him furious.

What right did that man have to look at her any longer? He’d had his chance, he’d had three chances and he blew each and every one; he had no right to look at her that way anymore. It made Loki seethe. Rose however didn’t care about that, telling him it didn’t matter one bit if the Doctor looked at her because she was only ever going to go home with Loki. This was enough to appease him but he still did not like the Doctor looking at her the way he did.

Loki sighed heavily, not wanting to think about it when he should be enjoying his morning. The sigh was enough to have Rose angling her head up to look at him.

“Somethin’ wrong?” 

Loki shook his head. “Just thinking.”

“You’re always thinkin’.”

“The burden of having a cunning mind; it never stops.”

Rose cocked at eyebrow at this. “Always _plottin’_ , you mean,” she said with a knowing smirk.

“Oh, now that’s unfair,” he pouted, feigning hurt. “I do more than _plot_.”

“You still plot. You’re always up to somethin’.”

“Well, of course I am but I do other things, too. Really, Rose, there is more to me than cunning schemes.” He turned towards Rose, pulling her more fully against him, kissing her lips ever so gently.

“Alright, cunnin’ schemes an’ sex...my own little god of sex and mischief,” she smiled playfully, sliding her fingers into his hair, hooking one leg around his waist to pull him closer as she kissed him more deeply.

He hummed, delighted by her mood and succulent kisses, “I am hardly _little_ ,” he reminded her, thrusting just once inside her, a tease and a taste of what she could look forward to. 

She gasped and smiled up at him, “No,” she agreed.

“My little wolf, don’t tell me you are only with me for my talents in bed, there is so much more to me,” he crooned, kissing her jaw.

“You are,” she agreed with a gasp as he laid a trail of kisses down her neck. “So much more,” she whispered encouragingly, lifting her hips to try and meet his.

“Insatiable...” he murmured, capturing another kiss and a sigh from her lips; but he had no room to talk, finding himself burying himself inside her once again.

Once more they lost themselves in each other, tangled in the sheets and worshiping each other in the golden glow of morning. Their strangled cries and ardent moans filled the room as they held onto one another; their passion overflowing, filling them and leaving them breathless in each other’s arms.

Rose hummed against his chest as she curled comfortably against him. He smiled, at peace once again. This was the life for him. Maybe he was no longer a god, but if this was punishment—well, he would accept it with open arms.

“Oh, dammit,” she cursed as her phone chirped

Loki narrowed his eyes at the ceiling. Leave it to Torchwood to ruin a perfectly good morning.

“Tch...Dad wants me to come in early, needs a few things and help settin’ up for the Christmas party.”

“Oh, yes; the party,” Loki sighed.

“Don’t give me that look,” she warned. “We’re goin’ and that’s that.”

“Rose, _you_ were the one who didn’t want to go. In fact, I remember specifically last time you were the one to drag _me_ out of there after only fifteen minutes.”

Rose exhaled shortly, “I know but that was different, I was...not happy then and being around everyone...well it’s not the same. Besides, I promised. We won’t stay long but it’s still expected of us.” 

With that, she hopped out of bed, allowing him to admire her backside and every angle and curve of her body, her hips swaying as she made her way to the closet to dress. Now that was just a damn dirty trick meant to convince him—it, of course, worked. He watched her dress lazily as he continued to lay in bed, hands tucked behind his head, figuring he might as well since she had just used it convince him to do something he’d much rather forgo. It took some effort to not go about pulling her back into bed with him for another round of love-making; even if she went along with it, she’d not appreciate him making her late.

“What time is the party again? I’m not needed there early am I?”

“No. Not fair if ya ask me but—starts about seven, you should try to get in there by six, though,” she answered, buttoning her shirt. “An’ dress nice!”

“Do I ever dress elsewise?” He asked though raised his hands in defeat as she gave him her signature look. 

“I’ll be changin’ there. Lots to do.”

He rolled out of bed just as Rose was leaving and pulled on his boxer briefs, heading for his room—though these days, the only thing the room housed were his old clothes. Most of the clothes he’d been wearing were freshly bought and were now stored alongside Rose’s things; they were also primarily his work clothes, most of which were suits he wore daily. There was no reason he should head to a party in a suit he wore all the time. He was sure he’d left a few dress suits in this closet.

As Loki dug through the clothes he’d left behind, all manners of tees and dress-shirts, setting out likely candidates, he came across a blue suit stuffed in the very back of the closet. He took it out, eyeing it carefully. He could not remember having purchased or even worn this suit but he found it odd how familiar the suit seemed—that’s when it struck him: this was The Doctor’s suit. 

In a sudden fit of anger, he tossed the suit aside. Why was it still here when that infernal double was supposed to have taken all his things and left her life for good? Yet here in the back of this closet, this little reminder remained to haunt Loki and remind him of a man who had hurt Rose and who had taken her from him. Must that man always be such an intrusion on their lives? An ever-present annoyance?

Loki had to wonder if the Doctor had done this on purpose, leave this reminder for Rose so that she would always think of him. Or had he truly forgotten it? When Loki had come back, he was sure the man had been wearing this suit; perhaps he had multiples. Whatever the case, the sight of the blue suit sickened him. The fact that he would doubtless see that worthless part Time Lord at the party that evening, made Loki seethe. He would have to fight his urge to throttle him on sight—

—but oh the idea he just had! 

A wicked smile crossed his face, picking the suit back up off the floor, dusting it off as a plan formulated in his mind. He was sure he would get an earful from Rose about this decision later but he could handle that well enough, he simply could not miss this opportunity.

~~~~

Loki had promised to meet Rose at Torchwood in the meeting hall that had been converted into a party room up on the tenth floor. He made his way through the building, breezing by the security check points with ease, actually reveling in the stares he was receiving; it made him feel powerful again. Granted only a few would see this suit and understand what it meant, it raised his spirits. He was positively beaming with devious intent; several seemed to sense it and were rightfully wary.

The suit had fit him perfectly—if slightly tighter in the chest—and he had matched it with a black dress-shirt (forgoing a tie this time) and polished black shoes. He had taken care to comb back his hair just so, letting it remain only somewhat wavy and tousled from this morning’s activities.

When he reached the tenth floor and made his way into the now party hall, he was glad to find it already filled with a few notable faces. His ego swelled but he hid it well as he crossed the room with confident strides. Sadly, The Doctor was not yet in sight but Rose and Pete were on the far end of the room. He made his way toward them a bit more calmly this time, slowing his walk; he must not let Rose know just how eager he was to show the Doctor up in his own suit.

He admired Rose’s dress, long and white with gold and deep blue accents; absolutely stunning. It wasn’t long before Rose turned and locked eyes with him as he crossed the room. Upon reaching her and her father, he snaked an arm around her waist, planting a kiss on her lips before he turned to shake Pete’s hand, all the while pretending not to notice Rose’s smile fade into an astonished and open stare. 

Pete, likewise, gave him a questioning glance but whether or not Pete approved he seemed to think it better not to say anything. Rose, on the other hand, quickly took him by the arm, muttered an excuse to her father before steering Loki toward an empty corner near the fruit punch.

“What are you wearin’?” She asked in a rather harsh whisper.

“A suit, Rose. You wanted me to dress up...is this because I didn’t wear a tie?” He asked, feigning ignorance.

Predictably, Rose smacked his arm, “Don’t play coy with me, mister mischief! Now where did you find that suit?”

“It was at the back of my closet. Admittedly, I do not recall buying it, but it _is_ a rather nice suit.”

Rose narrowed her eyes knowingly; bless his sweet Rose, she could see right through his act. Even so Loki wasn’t about to step out of this role just yet.

“You have plenty of good suits in our closet, why didn’t you wear one of those?”

“I wear those every day, I wanted a change so I thought I’d look through my old closet and there it was.”

“That’s not _your_ suit! That’s...that’s the Doctor’s...” she hesitated over the name which made him falter ever so slightly; lucky for him, Rose had looked away and not seen it. 

“Is it really?” he asked in false amazement.

“Don’t act stupid, Loki! I know you know!”

“Rose, really, I thought it _was_ mine; it was in my closet after all.”

She definitely didn’t buy it and she was perfectly roused now. He was sure to hear more of it when they got home but, like him, she didn’t want to make a big domestic scene in front of the whole of Torchwood. 

She shook her head, “This is just mean, Loki...”

“If it bothers you so much, we will destroy it when we get home,” –in fact, Loki rather liked that idea—“but I cannot very well do anything about it now. I have nothing to change into here.”

“We’ll talk about this later,” she said stiffly, “I’m gonna go talk with Dad. Don’t get into any trouble!” She added waspishly, pointing a finger at him before walking away in a bit of a huff.

He would definitely pay for that later, he had no doubt. Perhaps this was a bit cruel of him, this little torment he had planned for the Doctor—though his soul concern was how upset Rose was with him. He didn’t much enjoy having her upset with him but this was simply an opportunity he could not miss.

~~~~

Loki spent part of the evening conversing with a few notables, Rose joining him on occasion for appearances sake, still giving him the eye when no one else was looking. He did his best to ease her mind, gently teasing her and remaining on his best behavior—the Doctor still had not showed—and soon enough, Rose’s anger had wilted just enough for him to lead her onto the dance floor.

“ ‘M still mad at you,” she said, reminding him with a wary eye.

Loki merely smiled his most charming smile and leaned in to kiss her, “I know.”

“Don’t smile at me like that, you arse,” she said, smacking his chest.

He hugged her nearer as they spun across the room, “Cannot I not enjoy being in your company, my dear Rose? I am trying to enjoy the night with you as you yourself bade me to do.”

Rose sighed as she looked up at him, “I know. You can just be so infuriatin’ sometimes.”

He had to laugh gently at her words, “One cannot simply stop being the God of Mischief. I may be without my magic but I can still indulge in some minor roguish pranks. It is in my very nature, Rose. You knew this from the start.”

“Yes, ‘cept you seem to focus a lot of it on him.”

“With good reason,” he reminded her.

“You won’t let it go, will ya? You have me. Do you really need to torment him?”

“No, I don’t need to.” I _want_ to, he finished silently. 

Rose didn’t notice the sentiment, resting her head on his chest, allowing their dance to continue. He held her closer, glad that she was forgiving him for now. Perhaps he had no reason to do this after all—but that’s when he spotted the Doctor across the room. 

Once more he smiled deviously, the Doctor could clearly see them and, if the anger on his face was any indication, he recognized the suit as well. The part human Time Lord was watching the pair of them slow dance to the classy Christmas music. It was the perfect slap in the face.

Satisfied that the Doctor was suffering the sight of them together, Loki ignored him completely. He put all his attention on Rose as they chatted up friends and business partners alike, and made occasional trips to the dance-floor. Sipping on champagne and eating hor d’oeurvres that were being passed around. 

It wasn’t until Rose made her way to the restroom that his evening changed. He was waiting around quietly for Rose’s return, sipping at his champagne, when The Doctor approached him.

“You are enjoying this aren’t you?” The Doctor asked.

Loki gave him a sidelong glance, a relaxed look upon his face. “What are you on about?”

“My suit.”

This made Loki raise an eyebrow at the man, looking him over, “What about your suit? It looks fine. A bit... _boring_ , the whole black and white tuxedo and bow tie but...it’s fine.”

“Not--!” The Doctor took a deep breath, “the suit you are wearing...it’s mine.”

“ _Is_ it?” Loki asked in surprise, a hand brushing over the front of his jacket. “I had no idea. I found it in my closet, thought it was one of the ones I left.”

“That’s an outright _lie_!” The Doctor snapped. “You know darn well that that suit is mine and you wore it just to spite me.”

“Not everything is about you, you know.”

“Monster and God of lies and tricks, that’s all you are. You only want to hurt me. Why do you take such pleasure in my misery?”

 

Loki smiled darkly, “Because you caused her nothing but anguish.”  
“That’s over. You have her, you won! Why must you continue to torment me with your games?”

“Because you will not leave. Because you stare at her openly, charming her when you can, and trying to take her back only now that you see she has moved on. You have no right to stare at her the way you do. You lost. She is mine. Move. On.”

“There it is; your true nature. Cruel and vindictive and controlling. You’ll just hurt her in the end. She won’t let you control her.”

“You are correct in that at least, I will not. She is at my side of her own volition...stop trying to sway her. You had your chance and you failed,” Loki sneered.

“That is still no reason to act like a child and do all you can to torture me with these games of yours.”

“It was me there, picking up the pieces whenever you hurt her. All you _ever_ do is hurt her, and I am not about to let you steal her away to do it all over again. Leave her alone and let her be happy. I can make her happy, we are happy, so leave. Leave this place and our sight forever, _Time Lord_. I am tired of your presence in her life and I will mock you and be the bane of your existence until you get the point. I will not stop. You brought this on, _Doctor_. Not I. All you ever do is run away, so go...run...it’s what you’re good at.”

It was the first time Loki had been caught off guard but it seemed he had angered the Time Lord enough to make him snap. The Doctor’s fist connected with his jaw and an outburst of shock rang through the hall. Loki swore her heard Pete yelling, and shout from Rose as The Doctor landed another punch to his chest. Loki caught his arm as he tried again and managed a hit to the Doctor’s nose, making him crash to the floor, landing on his back.

The part human Time Lord glared viciously up at Loki as blood spilled from his nose. Loki wiped the side of his mouth, blood staining the back of his hand, staring down the man with a cool sort of triumph. The Doctor moved to stand, ready to fight again but Rose was soon standing between them.

“No!” She shouted at the Doctor, “Don’t you dare try to do that again.”

“Rose! He’s—!”

“Just go!”

The Doctor stood, a defeated and hurt look in his gaze. “Fine...” he spat, “I’m tired of lookin’ at the pair of you. Just don’t come lookin’ for me when he hurts you.” And with that, The Doctor left.

Rose sighed heavily turning to Loki. She still looked angry, though if it was all for the Doctor or him, he couldn’t tell. “We’re goin’ home. You’ve got blood all over you.” She took his arm, leading him away with half-hearted apologies as they passed others.

It was a quiet ride home, and quieter still when they returned. She took no time divesting him of the coat, tossing it in the bin before grabbing a wet towel to clean him up.

“Did he break anythin’?” She asked, still not looking at him.

“No.”

“You provoked him didn’t you?”

“He provoked me.”

“Don’t buy it. You were the one to wear his suit. I _know_ you knew it was his. Why must you be so mean? This isn’t the man I know.”

“Rose...”

“No, I don’t want your excuses. I just want it to stop.” She sounded tired.

“I will stop...if he keeps his distance.”

She glared up at him, “That is not your decision.”

“He is only going to try to take you away from me, like he always does.”

“And I told you that it’s not gonna happen!” She snapped. “How many times I gotta tell ya? What do you want me to say?! I’m tired of fightin’ about this, Loki.”

“Rose...”

“No!” She stood now, furious and looking exhausted. “What you did tonight? It was spiteful, you meant to hurt him! I know he punched you first and I know he must have said something rude but what you did was cruel. You can’t be doin’ that!”

“I did not mean to upset you,” he stood, reaching for her but she pulled away, he recoiled, wounded by the look in her face and the tears now there.

“I...” she sniffed, “I need some time. I’m going to stay at mum’s a while...”

“No...Rose! Please, I—!”

“I just...I need some space. You need to sort yourself out...because I really can’t be fighting over this every time. He’s gonna be there, I’m gonna be there, and so are you. This needs to stop.” She turned to go, picking up her purse. “I’ll see you at work, t’morrow...”

His heart sunk, “Rose...when will you come home?”

She glanced teary-eyed over her shoulder at him, “I don’t know...”

“I am sorry, Rose,” he said softly, pleadingly, hoping she’d turn back around.

“I know,” she whispered, closing the door softly behind her, leaving Loki to sink back into his place on the sofa. 

Once again, he had gone too far.


	6. Sigh No More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Separation is a painful business as they both struggle to get passed what had happened. Rose finds her self at the doctors only to find out some important news that will change everything. She soon finds herself seeking out the Doctor to reconcile things before returning to Loki who thinks he's finally driven her away.

As anyone with a broken heart would know, sleep does not come easy and, in most cases, doesn’t come at all. Lonely lovers lie in the dark with tears in their eyes, whispered words to the one no longer there; staring at the ceiling but seeing better times and then their failings played on repeat to torment them endlessly. The brokenhearted murmur apologies to the darkness, wishing that if their lost lover heard them then they might be forgiven and held and comforted. The whispers fall to emptiness, never heard, and the tears continue as they pray for redemption and wishing with all their heart that they had done something different.

He laid in what had been their bed that first night, trying to draw some sort of comfort from the scent of her left on the pillows now tearstained but it only made him miss her more. When he went to his old bed, he could not help but be overcome with the overwhelming loneliness by being there. No matter what he did, sleep would not save him from the ache in his chest, and he was left to suffer the night and the darkness alone.

It was a deserved torment. He had failed her terribly, doing the one thing he had sworn he wouldn’t do—but in his arrogance and jealousy he had revealed his doubt and inadvertently hurt her. Once more he had showed his weakness and insecurity, all of it left over from his first stay with her. She had chosen the Doctor then, leaving him in anguish that caused him to lash out fiercely. 

He could not doubt that he was worried she would leave him again; that ever nagging feeling that he would lose to that Doctor. He had lost her before; the man had always been such a large part of her life and had such a hold on her heart that Loki almost found it hard to believe she had chosen him—for a time. 

Loki could have been content, he nearly was but the sight of that suit had set him on edge. It was a nasty reminder of his fear and it had felt like an attack and Loki had picked up his old habit and lashed out cruelly in retaliation—it had cost him Rose’s trust and hurt her. 

The following morning when he had gone to work, exhausted but desperate to see her and hopefully talk with her, he found that she avoided him at every turn. Almost everyone had avoided him those first few days unless absolutely necessary. Pete was the only one to talk with him but he had not been happy. 

Loki endured the father lecture of not hurting his little girl while, at the same time, telling him that his girl was an adult and he could not control any of the situation but warned Loki to watch his step around her and give her space. Wanting nothing more than to regain Rose’s trust, Loki did as her father suggested and kept his distance where possible, despite his overwhelming urge to talk to her and ask her to come home. 

The week proved a lonely and isolating experience, one he was achingly familiar with. He let it be a reminder. He would endure.

The Doctor turned up later in the week, his nose still a sickly color but healing. Most of the staff remained friendly towards him, which made Loki’s seclusion all the worse. Loki made it a point to spend most of his time in his office, blinds drawn, confined to his desk where he worked and ate until he was no longer needed—something he was beginning to feel was prominent throughout his life—and returned to the barren place he called home.

~~~

Rose liked it best when she was working. Her thoughts could remain on alien technology and threats; here she had no room to think about Loki and the way they had left things. There were those moments when they ended up passing in the halls, finding herself looking longingly after him only to see that he would not turn to meet her gaze, ashamed. 

For all her anger over what he had done, she missed him terribly. Her dreams, once pleasant, turned to nightmares of falling through the sky and him falling in the opposite direction. Every night she fell asleep on a tear-dampened pillow, an aching emptiness beside her, and woke up with more tears in her eyes. 

She wanted to say it was a comfort, being home, and it was in a way. It was nice to listen to her mother as she prattled on about nonsensical things, ranting away about sales and friends and her work, doing her best to not mention Torchwood. Anytime Jackie did touch on the subject, she would wave her hand away saying she didn’t want to talk about that place—“Who wants to talk ‘bout work?”—and get to making a nice cuppa, all of Rose’s favorites. It was a bit ridiculous, Rose had to admit but it was nice.

Her little brother, Tony—who was well on his way to turning six—was also a welcome distraction. He had so much energy that Rose couldn’t even think straight at the end of their play time together.

However, at those times when her mother fell quiet—not even Jackie Tyler could talk forever, no matter how she tried—and when Tony was off asleep or exploring outside, Rose was left to her thoughts and the two men who had always dominated them. 

The Doctor had been such a huge part of her life and someone she had loved with all her heart but after losing him at Bad Wolf Bay, fighting her way back only to have him drop her back here with her new (new-new-new, to be precise) Doctor, it had hurt her all over again. She worried about her old Doctor, knowing how hard it must have been for him to leave, for she had known him so well. And her new Doctor, stuck here with her, they had been something new themselves. Good times and bad, as ever...but, in the end, she had still lost him. 

There had always been love there, but they had both changed. She had matured and grown far more able in her separation of him. She did what needed to be done; she learned to make the hard choices. She was the new-new Rose. The Doctor was different, as well. Yes, he was like her old war torn Doctor with the goofy ears and the leather jacket...but he still had the gob of her new-new Doctor and he was so like Donna. 

It was never the fact that she didn’t like her human Doctor, she had loved him, but everything started to feel off. There was no other real way to put it. It was hard to accept him at first but oh so gradually she did begin to love him for who he was and not just who he resembled. He, however, never seemed to get over it. He was a man with the memories of all those nine-hundred years of life and all the love and adventures, and yet...they weren’t his. Whenever he would recount their own travels: like dancing together for the first time as Jack watched on or when they took on the werewolf with Queen Victoria at their side, her Doctor would suddenly fall silent as if he had spoken something forbidden. It had not actually been him, and this truth continued to bother him.

No matter how she reassured him, he would pull back. Eventually, he had decided to go in search of who he was. He traveled—the world and not the stars as the TARDIS coral was still undeveloped—and came back on occasion to be with her. He had not wanted her to come, determined to come to terms with himself. Eventually the visits lessened, and the letters all but stopped. He said continually that he still loved her but in the end he would not accept that she could love him for the man he was. He had told her he was too different and that her heart was either in that other dimension with the true Time Lord or with a fallen God.

They fought about Loki often, she remembered. Rose had been reluctant to get rid of his things, hoping that he would return. She had hoped this could be a place he could still call home. Even with her new Doctor at her side, she had hoped to see her lost God one more time, even if it was just to say goodbye. There was no telling where he had gone and she had worried openly about him. She knew he had been hurt by her leaving.

Of course she knew he loved her. The ache in her chest as he had asked her to stay, the hurt in his eyes when she said she couldn’t; it had been one of the hardest decisions she had ever made. Her leaving had hurt him terribly. 

The Doctor had asked her repeatedly to get rid of his things; gently at first, realizing her hurt and being his old Doctor self but, when she still couldn’t bring herself to remove Loki’s things, he became openly angry. He was insecure about her attachment to Loki. There was no doubt he could read her feelings for the fallen God, even when she, herself, had tried not to acknowledge it. Now he was fighting the memory of two men he could never be, something they argued about a good portion of the time. There was no consoling him. He finally left.

How devastated she had been, left for the third time by her Doctor, left to cry alone. Wonder of wonders, though, in the midst of her tears, she found her lonely God had returned to her and once more saved her.

Now she had been the one to walk out on him.

It had been needed, she told herself. Loki had crossed a line, been cruel to the Doctor and doubted her. For the life of her she couldn’t understand why he felt the need to be so vindictive when she had told him countless times that she was with him for good. How could he doubt her love for him? 

_Then again_ , she thought; she had left him once. She had chosen the Doctor and ignored the growing love she had for Loki. It did not excuse what he had done but she could understand why he had felt threatened—at least the reason behind it. The question was now how she could convince him that he never had to worry about that. The conversation had never worked for The Doctor but she had to admit that her heart had not been entirely there for him when she should have been. Her heart _was_ with Loki; that was the difference.

Rose sighed heavily into her tea. She wanted to go home. She wanted to see Loki and have him smile at her; feel his arms wrapped around her and have that comfort of his nearness. There was nothing she wanted more but he needed to sort things out. She didn’t want to fight anymore.

Her stomach gave a turn and she moaned. Seems she had upset herself to the point of sickness. The past few days had been like that. Between the stress and the depression, she had little desire to eat and her stomach reacted terribly. It had gotten to the point that she made herself dizzy sometimes, always having her mother fussing over her and forcing tea and biscuits into her system because, of course, that solves everything. 

Rose also found herself sleeping more than usual towards the end of the week, almost too lethargic to get out of bed. It was as though she had come down with the flu without the rest of the symptoms. 

“Just go to the doctor, Rose...not _that_ Doctor, of course, a real doctor of medicine and everything. You’re out of sorts and you look pale, sweetheart.” Jackie fussed, tucking some of Rose’s hair behind her ear. “Better than lying about and moanin’ about it. What’s that gonna solve, I ask you? I’m tellin’ ya, you’re just depressed but better safe than sorry, I say. What if it’s somethin’ serious?”

“Mum, I don’t need to go to the doctor, I’m fine, really.”

“I’ll not hear another word, you need to take care of yourself, sweetheart. Just go, if anything to ease my mind so I won’t be worryin’. I’ll go make an appointment.”

“Mum!” Rose shouted exasperated, but it was too late, Jackie had already gone off to the next room to make her call. Once more she sighed into her tea, and took a sip. Well, if it would get Jackie off her case, then she might as well.

~~~  
Rose hugged her arms as she walked. The trip to the doctor had not gone as expected. Of all the things she had expected to hear after her examination, that was not even on the list. Now she had some serious thinking to do. What would she tell mum? Dad? Tony? Though he was little, he doubtless would understand the concept. And Loki—what was she going to tell him? _How_ was she going to tell him? This was too big to keep from him, she couldn’t, she had to involve him. At least she would be going home—only she did not know how this would play out. What would Loki think? Would he be happy? 

She didn’t even know how to feel about it herself. Was she even ready? She didn’t know.

Restless, Rose went for a walk, shutting off her phone, she really wasn’t ready to talk with her mum, who she knew would weasel the truth out of her before she was ready. Her thoughts were rampant. Decisions had to be made; important ones that she wasn’t ready for. Before she knew it, she was crying, her feet carrying her blindly forward.

It was then that she found herself at the Doctor’s flat. She blinked back her tears and tentatively knocked. There was no answer. She tried to remember his work schedule; for all she knew he had gone in today or back to traveling. Given how things had ended at the party, it was very possible he had decided to go away for a while. He had been at Torchwood the day before last, if she remembered correctly but they had not spoken. He had ignored her completely.

She sighed and turned to leave. It had been a foolish mistake to come her. Just then, the door opened.

“Rose?”

She turned quickly around to see the Doctor standing there, looking as dressed down as she could ever remember seeing him, a plain white tee and jeans. She had to admit it was a good look on him. With some effort, she gave him a smile.

“Hey.”

The Doctor frowned slightly at her giving her a once over. “You’ve been crying.”

She looked down and nodded, unable to deny it.

“I told you not to come to me when he hurt you...” The Doctor tried to sound harsh but the fire went out in him to see her upset the way she was. 

“It’s not—” she sighed, “It’s not like that. It’s somethin’ else. I mean...”

Noting the expression on her face, he opened his door completely, waving her in. “Just have a seat...” he quickly started picking up bits of his clothes laid over his couch. “Sorry ‘bout the mess. Do you want any tea or coffee?”

“Jus’ some tea, thanks,” she smiled gratefully. She watched as The Doctor went about making the tea, musing how odd it was to see him here on his own, a true bachelor. He had still managed to do decent here on his own. “So how are ya?”

“Been better,” he replied.

She noted the now green bruise around his nose and eye. “He didn’t break it did he?” She asked, touching the side of her nose.

“Oh...no, I’m fine, just a bit sore...” he meant more than just the physical hurt. He finished up with the tea, bringing it over to her at the couch. He sat across from her in his own chair, glancing up at her curiously. 

“Thanks,” she said again, sipping at her drink. “Nothing like a good cuppa. You’ve gotten better at it.”

“Why are you here, Rose?” He asked, cutting the niceties.

Rose’s smile dropped as she looked up at him, lowering her drink to her lap. “I...wanted to apologize.”

“For what?”

“For what he did...he shouldn’t have done it.”

The Doctor shook his head. “I don’t really care, to be honest, Rose.”

“He still shouldn’tve done it. It was cruel of him to do that. I can’t believe he did that...wearin’ your suit...it was so mean and he had to be insecure about—” 

“I have a confession,” he said suddenly, cutting across her, fidgeting in his seat.

“What?”

“I...left it there...”

“I figured you had forgotten it. He found it an’ got all mad—”

“No,” he stopped her again. “No...I left it...on purpose.”

Her eyes met his in shock. Loki had feared that the Doctor was going to try to take her way, to sway her—he’d been right. “You what?”

He looked down at his own drink. “It was before he came back. I just wanted you to think about me...”

Rose found herself standing, setting her drink aside, “You’re the one who left!”

“I know!” He snapped, “I know...but I still loved you. I just wanted you to love me for me...not because I look like him. Your heart was always with him or with that...Loki. I did want us to have a chance, Rose. Trust me, I did.” He reached out to grab her hands, “I know I’m a different man, I didn’t know if...I didn’t think...” he sighed heavily leaning toward her. “Rose, I love you. I doubt I can ever stop. I wanted you to love me...but I’m just human, Rose...what chance do I have against a Time Lord and a God? I thought I could be all that you needed but I was too confused and it got all screwed up. I left my suit; I wanted you to find it and remember me and...need me...” 

The Doctor had tears in his eyes now, fighting his urge to pull her to him. One of his hands did come up to her rest on her cheek. “I wanted you so desperately to need me. I was so thick. I ran off because I was afraid and I left you alone. All I do is hurt you and I was selfish. Loki came back and I thought it ruined everything, because you wouldn’t need me, and I wanted him to find that suit. It was stupid. I knew he would throw a fit, man that he is, but...”

Rose pulled back appalled by this revelation. Saddened by her Doctor’s tears but disbelieving of his actions. “He was right then...you were trying to...this whole time...?” Tears blurred her vision.

“I’m so sorry, Rose. It was childish, and I regret it and I know you can’t forgive me. I screwed things up...for both of you. I want you happy, Rose...even if it can’t be with me.”

The expression on his face pained her. He was truly lost and broken now. Sad and desperate. Defeated. But he had admitted his fault with the utmost sincerity. Her Doctor, he was still that. There was love there but it was different now. 

She took a deep breath, calming the tears and the emotion boiling in her chest. “Doctor... ‘m sorry. We kep’ missin’ each other.” Rose moved to reach for him but pulled back. 

“No, Rose...I...” he let out a shuddering breath, “Blimey, look at me, I’m a mess.” He laughed back his tears, “Not used to that.” He looked back up at Rose. “I do want you happy...and I hope we can still be friends.”

A smile spread over her face. “ ‘Course. We’re always friends, yeah?”

The Doctor nodded, “So...as a friend, strictly speaking, can I ask what happened? I know I mucked it up...the way he’s been actin’. He’s not even glarin’ at me.”

Rose nodded, “Yeah, um...I’ve been stayin’ with mum.” She began picking at her nails, nervously. “I was mad...an’ I left. Needed some space.”

“While I know this is goin’ against everythin’ I’ve ever said about ‘im...but I didn’t exactly help matters concernin’ ‘im...I think you should go talk things out. You know, if you really love ‘im...and no need to be too emphatic when you answer.”

“I do, and I was plannin’ on it... ‘cept...”

“What is it?”

“I went to the doctor’s office today, because mum was worryin’ an’ I wasn’t feelin’ good. I jus’ thought it was me bein’ upset, yeah? Worked myself up so much that I made myself sick but...” she hesitated.

“Rose, what is it?” He moved close, taking hold of her arms, “Are you okay?”

She looked up at the Doctor, teary-eyed and worried. “ ‘M pregnant...”

The Doctor’s jaw dropped and for the first time, he was truly at a loss for words. He kept his eyes locked on her disbelieving, his emotions conflicted. “H—how far along?”

“Three weeks...I dunno what to do. I dunno if I’m ready to be a mum. I just—I dunno how I’m gonna tell ‘im or if he’ll be happy. ‘M so confused.”

“Well...are you happy?” He asked, still holding her steady.

“Y...yes...I mean...I am but...i dunno. It’s a big thing. How do I know if I’m ready? ‘M a bit scared.”

He gave her a short smile, “No one is ever ready. Not even I was ready...”

Rose turned to stare at him, he had only briefly mentioned his time as a parent before, “That’s right...you were a dad...were you scared?”

“Down right terrified! Me? A dad?! Who in their right mind would let me be a dad; I mean, look at me! I’m not stable, I’m completely mad, I always muck things up...but there I was, a dad! I was scared...and so proud. And you, Rose Tyler, you’d be a great mum.”

Rose laughed, “Yeah? What about ‘im?”

The Doctor grimaced comically, trying to fight back his own reservations. He didn’t truly have a say in their lives. If that God mad her happy, then who was he to deny her? “ _Well_ ,” he said with emphasis, the same old Doctor, “Can’t be worse than me now, can he? And I was rubbish.”

“I bet that’s not true.”

He smiled, “So what now, Rose Tyler? What are you going to do?”

She matched his smile, “I’m goin’ to go home...and I’m gonna tell ‘im.”

“Good. Need a lift?”

“Nah, I’ll manage. Hey...you two try an’ make friends, yeah?”

The Doctor made a face, “Oh, Rose, there’s askin’ a favor and then there’s askin’ the impossible. Best I can do is ‘civil’ for now, I’m afraid.”

“Yeah, I s’pose you’re right.”

“Good luck, Rose Tyler,” they hugged, “And be happy, can you do that for me? Have a fantastic life.”

At these words, the tears welled in her eyes, remembering the face of her old Doctor and the plea he’d made that broke her heart. It was different now, this time she’d listen. “I will.”

~~~

It was late afternoon when she arrived at her flat, her heart racing with the anticipation of what she was about to tell him and frantic because her mother had left a panicked message on her phone that she may or may not have made things worse. Apparently Loki had called to talk to her and Jackie had told him that she had gone to the doctor’s and he may or may not have misinterpreted that as her having gone to the Doctor’s place.

Her hands shaking, she took out her keys and unlocked the door, opening it carefully as her heart thundered in her chest.

“L—Loki?” She called but there was no answer.

She moved further into the flat looking around the darkened apartment, “Loki? You here?” She called again, nervously.

“Rose?” The voice was hard, hollow, disbelieving, coming from the hallway. 

Rose moved toward it, her heart quickening anxiously and stopped as she saw Loki emerge from his old room, still in one of his suits from work, his jacket and tie missing. He looked sweaty, his eyes red-rimmed, a distressed look on his face.

“Loki...hey...”

He stared at her, confused and hurt. “You...came back.”

“Of course I did.”

Loki looked at her, his heart shaking. He didn’t understand, how could she be here? He had screwed up too badly. He had messed up everything and hurt her and made her leave. He wanted so badly to fix things, so he had left her alone, doing as she asked and no more. He had finally given in to call her only to learn from Jackie that she had gone to the Doctor’s. He had driven her away and back to someone he thought could only hurt her—but he was no better. He had spent the last hour and a half drinking but Midgardian alcohol was still so weak but in his mortal state, he found himself feeling some of that gratifying numbness that it offered.

“Why are you here?” He asked, aching. Had she come to break it off formally?

“I wanted to see you,” she answered gently, noting the worry in his face.

“Why?”

“Because...I missed you.”

He shook his head, feeling very unstable, he was shaking. “Don’t...please don’t give me hope where there is none, Rose...I cannot bear it.”

“Loki...”

“No!” He hissed, “I know where you were...I went and I chased you back to him. It’s my own damn fault but please spare me your pretty words and leave me. Go be happy elsewhere; I’ll only hurt you. I have proved that, just as he warned. I let myself believe...” he laughed bitterly, “Always failing; I went too far again and...I chased you away.”

“No, listen, it wasn’t like that.”

“Your mother told me, Rose! Please spare me your comfort!”

“No! Listen you great arse!” She snapped. “My mother did not mean I went to him...I went to medical doctors.”

That sobered him, he stepped toward her, worriedly, reaching for her. “Wha—what’s wrong?”

“Nothin’s...nothin’s wrong...” she stammered, not quite sure of her words.

“Then...what...?”

“Loki...I’m...‘m pregnant...”


	7. All This and Heaven Too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki struggles with the thought of becoming a father and his own insecurities. Old friends--or rather alternate friends--make an appearance as the pregnancy progresses. A sudden appearance holds promise for their future.

The words echoed in Loki’s ears. A fear and a desire; a taunt and a promise of better things. His breath froze in his lungs as he stared at her in complete disbelief, not understanding how what she said could possibly be true. This beautiful woman who had hemmed his broken heart back together and held his hand in the darkest moments of his life, showing him love he never thought he deserved—she could not possibly be carrying his child.

Not once did he consider such a possibility. Surely a monster such as himself did not deserve the right to father children, for they would doubtlessly inherit his curse. He could not subject his children to such a fate, he could not ask his beloved Rose to carry his burden. It could not be true. It simply could not be. 

Loki reached for Rose, a pained expression on his face. “No...”

Tears sprang to Rose’s eyes, fear filling her. She had been afraid of his response but she had not expected this. “You...aren’t happy...i thought that...” The words choked her, her breath hitching in her throat as she fought back the emotion building in her chest. He hadn’t wanted this.

“No, Rose...it is not...it just...i cannot be...” his hands shook as he took hers. “Please tell me it is not so...I cannot have damned you with my progeny.”

Her expression changed in an instant, pulling her hands from his to cradle his face in her hands, “Loki, no...don’t say that...why would you...”

“I am a monster, Rose...” he whispered, his watery eyes meeting hers. “...the life I have had...I am not fit to be a father. I was abandoned by both of mine, how can I—"

“Loki...” her heart ached for him, wiping away the tears that dripped from his eyes. “You are nothin’ like them. You’re better than that...”

He closed his eyes, shaking his head slowly. “I am cursed. A damnedable thing. What if...they come out like me? I may have lost my power but I have not lost my heritage.” Once more his eyes met hers; fear apparent in them. 

“Blue, pink, green...frost giant or human...i don’t care,” she crooned, stroking his cheek. “I don’t care...because I love you.”

In an instant he pulled her in his arms and held her tight against his chest as he shook. He could not find the words to speak, every last one dying in his throat. He did not deserve this; he did not deserve her. Loki buried his face in her hair, breathing in the scent of her, aching for some comfort and calm that only she could give him.

Rose returned his embrace, kissing the saltiness of his tear-dampened cheek. “I will always love you,” she whispered soothingly, “...an’ I will love our children no matter what. They are ours. We will give ‘em everythin’ an’ love ‘em unconditionally. You an’ me. Together, yeah?”

She felt him nod and hugged him tighter, holding him until she felt his muscles relax. 

He sighed into her hair, his heart lightening to an extent but emotion still weighed heavily in his chest. “Forgive me, Rose. I have been a burden to you.”

Very slowly she pulled back to look at him, a gentle smile on her lips, “No. You are not a burden.”

“I went too far.”

“But you know that now. I don’t expect ya to be friends or anythin’ but...”

Loki nodded, “I will try for a bit of civility and diplomacy where he is concerned.”

She smiled more warmly, “Good...he and I talked before I came her—don’t be all you about this!” She said quickly. “Listen. I was scared, okay? I didn’t know if I was ready and I didn’t know how you were gonna act. I didn’t even want to tell mum because...well, you know mum, she’d not keep quiet ‘bout it. He is my friend an’ I trust him, okay? All he did was offer advice. I told him where I stand and we parted as just friends. It’s you an’ me for good. No question. I only love you.”

“And I, you...my Rose.” His lips met hers gently, the most amazing calm falling over him. Complete peace. “My sweet Rose...” he whispered, a hand sliding down over her still smooth stomach, “I am to be a father...”

Those words sounded so strange to him, so unbelievably foreign, and yet the most wonderful feeling came over him. Loki could not help the smile that crossed his face. Never had he imagined such a life. Acceptance. Love. Fatherhood. The things he was never granted for centuries. And here, on this small planet devoid of all the grandeur of Asgard, with the most ordinary and yet extraordinary people, living a mundane existence as a man and not a god, he at last found joy. All because of her. His Rose. His love.

~~~

There were all manner of machinery in this building, and every last beep and flash made his skin crawl with anxiety. The room eerily resembled a lab, the images of smiling people seemed hollow and soulless and the charts and models of a child growing within a mother’s uterus made the situation all the more intimidating.

They did not have such things on Asgard. They had their science and magic, of course but there were no Physicians as there were here. Asgard had healers and the determination of child and sex was done with runes and smoke and stars as some wise woman regarded the mother and father to be. This place was downright frightening. It was a little too much like Torchwood for his comfort. In fact they nearly had used Torchwood, given their situation, but it had made Loki too uncomfortable.

Loki’s hand gripped Rose’s—perhaps a bit too tightly—as she lay there on the examination bed in the half dark room, her in a medical gown, her stomach now exhibiting a rather healthy bump, quite large for being four months along. There was no telling how the pregnancy would go. While Loki was certain human and Aesir pregnancies were similar, he honestly had never researched his own heritage. He had no reference as to his own heritage in the matter of pregnancy and birth.

To say he was worried as an understatement. Rose had Loki fussing over her more often than even her mum, and that was saying something. He did absolutely everything to make her as comfortable as possible. On the one hand, it was terribly sweet; on the other...it was downright annoying.

Rose chose to say nothing right now, holding her lover’s hand as he glanced anxiously around the room, eyeing every piece of equipment as though it posed a personal threat to her safety; his thumb absentmindedly playing with the diamond ring now on her finger. A sweet reminder that he was now her fiancé. She smiled.

Loki, not accustomed to Midgardian tradition, had fumbled through a proposal one night when she had returned home late from work. He had made dinner, lit candles, put rose petals all over their bed and knelt...but as he stumbled over asking her to marry him, the alarm went off. One of the candles were not sitting two snuggly in their containers and had fallen over to light the table cloth on fire. Dinner had been ruined—along with the tablecloth that had been her mothers. In the end they had ordered take out Chinese and watched movies which, Rose thought, had been a far better evening than the one he had planned. Though they did put their bed to good use shortly after.

“It’ll be alright, Loki,” she promised, smiling over at him.

“I do not understand the purpose of these machines...are they safe?”

She giggled, “Yeah...see that one there with the monitor? Looks like a TV? That will show us the baby. And that thing there with that flat bit? That’s the ultrasound. They’ll run that over my stomach and it bounces the image to the screen.”

“Impressive...” he mumbled, still eying the machine warily.

“It’s not gonna hurt me. Promise.” She smiled, squeezing his hand gently. “We should be able to find out what we’re havin’ today too. If we wanna know.”

“This machine could tell us if they’ll be...Jotun or?” 

“No...” she gave him a sympathetic smile, knowing how he still worried, “It’s not that advanced, it’ll tell us if it’s a boy or a girl and stuff.”

“Oh...”

Just then, the doctor entered, someone Rose had not expected to see, though she gave the woman a full blown Rose Tyler smile.

“Hello then, I’m Dr. Jones, you can call me Martha, yeah? Sorry. I know you were expectin’ Dr. Harper but he’s had a bit of a family emergency.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Martha.” _And so good to see you_ , Rose thought. She’d have to be sure to tell the Doctor about this chance meeting. “I’m Rose Tyler and this is my fiancé, Loki.”

Martha glanced curiously at Loki, no doubt reviewing her knowledge of Norse mythology. “Like the God then?” She asked.

Loki straightened, “I—”

Rose squeezed his hand tightly, making him nearly squeak from the pressure as she smiled up at Martha. “Yeah, his parents were a bit eccentric.”

“You musta been a handful as a kid then,” Martha joked.

Loki catching on smirked, “You have no idea.”

Martha laughed, “Well, alright then, let’s get a look atcha. Stay warm under them blankets and lift up the gown, that’s it...” She pressed a few buttons on the machine, rolling it towards her. He grabbed the ultrasound wand and pulled out a tube of gel. “Now, this’ll be a bit cold.” She squirted it on to Rose’s stomach rolling the device over it to even it all out. “You sure you’re four months?” She asked.

“Yeah,” Rose answered, glancing at Loki and noting the stiff expression on his face. “I know ‘m a bit big...”

Martha nodded but paid attention to the screen, rolling the ultrasound over her and then she smiled over at her. “Well, it’s nothin’ to be worried about.” She turned up the volume and the sound of a heartbeat filled the room—multiple heart beats. “That’s three healthy sounding hearts.”

Rose gasped, “Three...? What do you...?”

Martha grinned widely, turning the monitor. “Triplets.”

There was a stunned intake of breath, both women turned toward Loki who’s eyes had shot open, staring blankly forward, his lips parted in shock.

“Are you alright, mate?” Martha asked, beginning to stand.

“Loki...hon...? It’s alright...Loki...?”

“Oh dear, he’s gone into shock. That happens.” Martha gave Rose an apologetic smile and went over to the small sink in the room, grabbing a small cup and filling it with water. She carefully put it in Loki’s empty hand. “Here, mate. Just take a drink. Do you need to sit?”

Loki glanced at the drink in his hand and slowly brought it to his lips, downing it quickly. “No, I...I am alright.”

Both eyed him skeptically.

“You sure?” Martha asked.

He nodded. “Yes...triplets? You are certain?”

Martha waved at the monitor, showing three visible shapes. “It don’t lie, mate. And if you listen carefully you can hear their hearts beatin’.”

Loki closed his eyes and listened to the deep thrumming sounds of heart beats, beating in time with each other, a symphony of beats that seemed to match his own. It was the most beautiful sound and feeling.

“Can you tell what they are? Boy? Girl?” Rose asked.

Martha glanced back at the screen. “It’s a bit harder to tell with multiples. They get in the way of each other, but this one...” she touched the screen, pointing to one of them that seemed to be covering the other two. “That is definitely a boy. The other two are covering themselves. He’s not modest at all, that one.”

Rose found herself laughing and glancing over at Loki. “Like his father already.” She poked her tongue out at him. He returned the smile.

~~~

Rose was in her last month of pregnancy, or so she dearly hoped. She had had to take the last three months off work, given carrying triplets only made everything harder. Walking had become a chore and had her mother coming to help her every day but, thankfully, without Tony in tow. Her brother was in school now.

Every now and then, the Doctor would drop by to check on her, bearing all manner of alien gifts to help with pregnancy now that he had the TARDIS, a green one, all grown. He was taking her on maiden voyages only—or so he said—for now, to get her into the swing of things. Often recanting tales of the differences between the planets from their old universe with this one. It certainly kept her entertained. It was made all the better when he one day turned up with Donna. This universe’s Donna.

She was just as spunky and kind as Rose could remember and she was ever so happy for her Doctor. He had his best friend back. The Doctor Donna was at it again. Nothing could be better than knowing he wasn’t alone and he could go back to being who he was meant to be.

There were also promises and offers to take her and Loki sometime in the future, once her kids were ready, and he swore to find safe planets to take them to. Loki and the Doctor were still not bosom buddies but they got on well enough these days, as amicably as they were ever likely to get. At least they didn’t seek to cause the other harm or humiliation—at least not in cruel ways. She could not stop Loki from spicing the Doctor’s tea with salt or for the Doctor to sonic things shut in Loki’s office. Intra-office pranks were harmless. Rose could ask no more than that.

One afternoon, just as her mother had left and Loki had called to apologize for having to run an hour late due to some alien causing havoc within Torchwood—Loki swearing up and down that it was not him—a storm suddenly hit.

Rose immediately called her mum to see if she had made it home safely and to warn Loki of the same, only he didn’t answer, doubtlessly working to contain the situation there at Torchwood. She then sat idly, watching the news, forecasters completely perplexed by the suddenly onslaught of rain. The rain softened to a drizzle as thunder rumbled ominously in the distance just as a knock sounded on her door. 

She jumped but stood—with difficulty—and waddled over to the door and opened it. 

There, hardly touched by the rain and standing in full armor with a red cape, was a tall muscular man. Rose had never met him before but given the descriptions Loki had given to her in the past, there was no doubt that this was Thor. 

She stared at him, perplexed. As far as she knew, Loki was now in exile. That he had been helped back here by Thor but would never return. Why now had this man come to her? Her heart pounded in worry.

“Thor?”

“You know me then?” He asked, his deep voice rumbling as he spoke.

“Of course. Why are you here?”

“May I...come in?” He asked, glancing at her stomach.

Rose hesitated for a moment; this was either very good...or very bad. In the end, she let him pass. “Can I get ya anythin’? Tea?”

“That will not be necessary, Miss...Tyler, correct?”

She nodded and waved for him to sit as she made her way back to the couch. “You’ll have to excuse me, it’s not easy bein’ on my feet these days.”

“I am...aware,” Thor replied swallowing almost nervously. “Heimdall has been watching...”

“He’s the...gate keeper, yeah? On the Bifrost?” She asked, tugging the knowledge Loki had given her in one of their many talks.

“Yes. We all—my father and mother and me, and Heimdall, of course—know you carry my brother’s...children.”

“And what of it?” She asked rather sharply, sitting straighter in her seat. She felt like a whale and knew she didn’t exactly look threatening sitting there in her sweats and tee shirts, her stomach overlarge—but if Thor and the rest of Asgard were going to start something, she wasn’t going to sit by and take it.

“Nothing, we...after long discussions with my father, who is getting on in years, such as gods go...have...decided to offer you both welcome. Frigga, our mother, she wishes to welcome you personally into the family. She is preparing a wedding for you. Once you have given birth and are ready, I will have Heimdall open the way and I will personally escort you both there.”

Rose blinked in amazement. “H—how is this possible? He’s...being...accepted? Forgiven?”

Thor smiled then. “I will not lie that there are many who still do not care for him but I and my mother have won out. I myself fell for a woman of Midgard, and Frigga is a supportive mother. She is the one we have to thank for swaying Father.” He took Rose’s hand in both of his. “Thank you. You have done more for my brother than any of us ever could. I am happy that he has found where he belongs and found love. I know we did not give him...what he deserved. Thank you, Rose Tyler of Midgard. I hope we can be friends.”

“Y—yeah...’course.” She nodded, still stunned.

“Now, I must go.” He released her hand and stood, starting for her door.

Rose followed him, “Wait! Don’t you want to tell Loki? He’ll be so happy...”

“I...do not know if he will. Not all at once, I am afraid. If he sees me, he may be unwilling to listen but he will listen to you. So, forgive me, my sister...” he smiled once more. “I will leave my brother in your most capable hands, and leave you to tell him. The news will be better received coming from the mouth of the only woman he has ever loved.” Thor bowed to her, taking her hand to briefly kiss her knuckles.

With a flash of lighting and a boom of thunder, he was gone and so was the rain.


	8. Welcome to Asgard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose and Loki become parents and Loki overcomes his insecurities until it is time for their trip to Asgard. They are accompanied by family and friends and the challenge comes when they meet Odin. Will he be forgiven and accepted?

There was no question that these children were his. Each and every one of them had come out blue only turning once Roses held them in her arms. Generally this would have been quite a sight for the doctor’s but, lucky for them, good old Martha Jones and Owen Harper were there for them. 

Owen had already been a regular at Torchwood but Martha was soon dragged in after a certain little incident in which a Plasmavore had escaped custody. Luckily for her Rose was in for her check-up and Loki happened to be present to put things to rights. He might not have been on the Torchwood tactical teams but he hadn’t forgotten how to fight, not by a long shot. It had been rather impressive for all present to see him wield the metal stand for IV bags like it was a staff, taking down the alien with hardly any effort.

Ever since the incident, Martha had become a contact for Torchwood and a rather good friend to Rose and Loki. Upon request, both Martha and Owen took care of Rose during her hospital stay.

The triplets were born happy and healthy and that marvelous shade of blue but as they turned they were not at all identical. Two girls and a boy; all with a full head of hair. The boy, named Eirik Peter Tyler, was as blonde as his mother but his eyes had that ever shifting quality of Loki’s; one minute blue, the next green, or a strange mixture thereof. One of the girls was like Loki in miniature with her raven black hair and his eyes; they named her Eira Jacqueline Tyler. The other was a spitting image of Rose, something that Jackie was keen to point out the moment she set eyes on her grandbabies. She was all golden hair and honey colored eyes with the rosiest cheeks. This one they named Susi Marion Tyler.

Loki had insisted that their children take her name instead of his, still half struggling with his own origins. He was not Odinson and nor was he Laufeyson, not anymore. He was merely Loki. Their customs of naming differed here in Midgard and he had no intention of his children being called Laufeyson or Lokison. Rose would keep her name and he would be simply Loki.

They were happy, struggling as all new parents do with sleeping and feeding schedules. Loki had been awkward at first but it didn’t take long for him to settle into his role. Rose often found him singing to the triplets in the old tongue; songs, Rose knew, he had heard in his own childhood. She would stand outside the bedroom, listening to his warm voice, not understanding the words but feeling the meaning; watching him as he held and spoke to their children with the softest tones.

She had been worried about how he would take to the role. Even though she had assured him often that everything would be alright, Loki had still exhibited some apprehension on how well he could handle it. To see him now no one ever would have known he had once feared it. Rose at last had found her happiness.

Six months passed as their little family fell into an easier routine. Loki and Rose were both back to work, though Rose had taken on less dangerous challenges for the time being, her mother often babysitting—with help of course.

Stress was quick to reenter their lives, however, as a new pressing matter drew closer. Their coming wedding and their impending trip to Asgard.

It had proven an interesting conversation all those months ago. Loki had come home with a rather crazed look in his eyes, nearly demanding what had happened. He knew Thor had come to visit, having recognized the sudden storm as an omen of his brother’s appearance on Earth. She had never seen him so worried, holding her protectively as though the gods would literally take her from him. 

Even after Rose had relayed the information Thor had given her, Loki was at a loss to believe it. He tentatively agreed but she knew beyond a doubt that Loki was worried. Given how fractured his familial ties were, Rose could not help but feel on edge herself. Not that she doubted Thor’s word, for he had seemed most sincere about their coming to Asgard and for a wedding that his mother was preparing, it was meeting Odin that set Rose ill at ease.

“He is a _severe_ man, my fa—Odin Allfather,” Loki corrected himself as he sat there rocking Susi and Eira as they lay asleep on his chest. “Seeing him will...” he didn’t even know what would happen but he feared it. He was not so worried about he would be treated, he already expected scathing looks once he reentered Asgard, but he now had his family to consider. If there was one thing Loki could not allow it was letting harm befall Rose and his children.

Rose drew nearer, resting little Eirik on her hip as she reached out to run her fingers soothingly through Loki’s thick black hair. “It’ll be all righ’,” she assured him. We won’t be goin’ alone. Thor said for us to bring guests. Granted we won’t be bringin’ many but...we’ll all be guests, yeah? It’ll be all righ’.”

“I do hope so, Rose,” he replied a slight hitch to his throat as he looked up at her from his chair. “I cannot lose my family, not when we are just starting. I will not forgive myself if—”

“You hush up. I won’t be havin’ ya talk like that. We’ll be fine. Promise.”

~~~

“Blimey!” Exclaimed Jackie, her knuckles white on the carriage that contained her three grandbabies. “Isn’t there a less dangerous way to travel though space an’ time? Couldn’t we have taken this one’s TARDIS?!” She asked, thumbing at the Doctor.

“Oi!” The Doctor exclaimed, affronted, “ _This one_? Jackie, we’ve known each other for years!”

“Well, I’m in a bit of a state; I can’t be responsible for everything that comes out of my mouth!” Both Pete and Rose chuckled at the exclamation.

“Well, in any case,” The Doctor went on, “...as stated, can’t very well pop from one dimension to the other like that on the TARDIS, the way is sealed but the Bifrost works in an entirely different way, you see—”

“Would you shut it a moment, I don’ need an explanation, I jus’ need a moment to catch me breath—oh!” She gasped, her hand flying to her chest in surprise, startled as she spotted the tall man in full armor, his sword resting in front of him.

“Welcome to Asgard,” the man said, his voice deep and reverberating.

“Everyone, this is Heimdall, the gatekeeper. He guards the Bifrost,” Thor explained.

Thor was the one who had brought them, acting as their personal escort to the shining realm of the Aesir. They weren’t a very large party; Rose and Loki were accompanied by their children, Jackie and Pete, Tony, The Doctor, Donna, and Martha. Most of them were dressed normally in their dress suits and whatnot but the two of them had taken care to dress more in the Asgard fashion.

Once again, Loki sported his old armor which had, until now, been relegated to the back of the closet or on the rare occasion Rose was feeling playful and asked him to wear it. It felt nice to be in the old armor, he had to admit; all that leather and the weight of it. If he was going to return to Asgard, he had promised himself to return there in full gear.

Rose had accompanied him, having a special outfit made for herself: full black leather corset, trimmed with green to match him; a black blouse underneath with black and gold banded arm braces; a sleeveless black leather coat went over the outfit, buckling over her waist, gold lining the edges, the bottom hanging just above her knees. Her pants were likewise black leather with knee high leather stiletto boots covering them. She wore little bits of jewelry of gold and emerald, nothing too large but enough to accent the ensemble. She had also taken care to do up her hair rather dramatically with waves and curls. She was all at once startlingly beautiful and dangerous. 

They made quite a match, the pair of them, and it gave Loki more comfort and confidence. He was about to show all of Asgard the life he had made for himself and the goddess he would soon be married to. He had not needed them for this; he had made his own way through trial and error. He was not a monster. He wanted to walk confidently through the mass of Lords and Ladies—and he would; he could.

Heimdall eyed the lot of them, his gaze lingering a moment over the babies and then at Rose who smiled brightly thought the man’s face showed no emotion. Loki’s hand tightened on hers. There was some lingering animosity, she knew, from what Loki had told her; it was no surprise that her soon-to-be husband was on edge. He had hardly said more than a stiff ‘hello’ to his brother as it was.

“Hello, Loki,” Heimdall said, his gaze steady on the trickster.

“Heimdall,” Loki replied, his lips pressed thin as he stared the large gatekeeper down.

“Guilty conscious still, I see. I will not harm your little family.”

“Good.”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Donna giving Heimdall a look and The Doctor rolling his eyes. Rose and Martha smirked knowingly at each other.

“Come on,” Thor called, leading the way once more through an archway and onto the vast expanse of the rainbow bridge.

There were several gasps as they stepped out.

“Blimey! Look at that!” Martha exclaimed looking over the side, “It’s like we’re walkin’ on a bridge in space...this is surreal.”

“Careful now, Martha Jones,” The Doctor said warningly, “you don’t want to fall off, no tellin’ where you’d end up.”

“You tellin’ me I could end up anywhere?” She asked looking over at him.

“ _Well_ , anywhere in the nine realms...then again...Loki ended up in our version of earth and that’s an entirely different universe.”

“Are you serious?” Donna cut in, “I could end up in a different universe from here?”

“Probably wouldn’t survive it...best not to think about it.”

“Well, I don’ like it,” said Jackie, “Couldn’t their royal godlynesses come down to Earth an’ had a proper weddin’? I’m tellin’ ya....this isn’t right.”

“Calm down, mum,” Rose said, repressing a giggle, “it’ll be all righ’.”

“How can you be so calm, Rose, the whole of the universe spinnin’ beneath us and you think we were out on holiday!”

“Mum, we _are_ on holiday, I’m ‘bout to be married. It’ll be fine.” 

Rose tried not to laugh as her little brother bounced excitedly taking everything in, just mouthing the word ‘cool’ as he attempted to drag their dad to the edge for a better look.

“We’re not gonna walk the whole bloody way, are we? To that place?” Jackie asked, nodding at the towers of the castle in the distance.

“Do not worry, Missus Tyler,” said Thor, stopping as he pointed to something headed toward them. “We shall ride.”

“You don’t expect me to ride a bloody horse!” 

“Calm down, Jacks,” Pete said attempting to calm her down, Tony still tugging at his arm. 

Though her father did seem in awe of Asgard, he was doing a magnificent job of being calm about this whole thing. Then again, live with Jackie Tyler long enough, one must master a rather zen approach to life or spend the rest of it having a screaming match. This Pete, she figured, had finally attained that zen-like approach.

Thor gave a booming laugh, “I have asked for a coach for the little ones, you are welcome to accompany them.”

“Oh, I will, I’m not ridin’ no bloomin’ horse...really...” she mumbled, just as the said coach and a man leading a small team of horses reigned in to a stop in front of them.

“Brought ‘em for ya,”said the large bearded man, holding a band of leads in his enormous hand. He smiled at the lot of them, his gaze then falling on Loki. “Hello, old friend.”

Loki cringed slightly, “I was unaware that I was ever your friend, Valstagg...” he replied.

The bigger man frowned just slightly. “I know we were...never close but I always thought you were alright before...” he cleared his throat awkwardly.

Nothing more needed to be said but Loki nodded. “You were...kinder to me,” he admitted, “...thank you.”

“Well, alright then!” Announced the Doctor. “Let’s get goin’ then? I think Jackie’s about to have a meltdown. That’s it.” He carefully helped load Jackie and the babies into the carriage. “Who’s up for a ride?”

“Mememememememememe!” Tony shouted excitedly, waving his hand in the air.

“Oh, no you don’t, it’s dangerous!” Said Jackie, attempting to wave him inside.

“Please, mum! I’ll be good! Loki! Can I ride with you, pleeeeeeeeeeease!”

Loki couldn’t help but smile and laugh at Rose’s little brother. The two had always got on rather famously and when Tony wanted something super bad he always came running to Loki. Rose couldn’t help but smile as Loki agreed, assuring Jackie that it would be alright. For the first time since they arrived, he seemed at ease. 

After helping her onto her own horse, Loki climbed onto the back of another, Thor helping Tony up to sit with Loki. Only the Doctor and Martha seemed keen to join them on horseback, both Pete and Donna unable to get over their nerves had joined Jackie and the triplets in the coach. 

Rose was worried at first but once they broke into a run, she was exhilarated, beaming brightly as she ran alongside Loki and her brother. Thor led the way, The Doctor and, Martha ran behind them, followed by the carriage and Volstagg with the remainder of the horses.

When they arrived at the magnificent golden palace, they all dismounted and piled out, lining up to follow Thor inside. 

“We have a welcome feast in store,” the large blonde man explained, “Would you like to see your rooms first? Or shall we head to the great hall?”

Rose and Loki glanced back at the others and then at each other.

“Lead us to the great hall...brother,” Loki replied.

Rose saw Thor’s mouth twitch with a small smile. “Of course.”

It was hard to take everything in, made more difficult by the Doctor rattling off about what he knew of Asgard personally, about the Aesir and the Time Lords being nearly cousins—“very very distant, mind you”—and all the lore and the structure and the science that was very nearly like magic. Martha and Donna and Tony were drinking in all of this information, their eyes flitting from structure to structure, open-mouthed staring at anyone that passed them by. Even Jackie seemed impressed. Having now lived in her very own mansion, she had a keen eye for grandeur and it seemed to Rose that she was planning to redecorate a bit once they got back home—which explained Pete’s slightly agitated expression.

When they reached the great hall, there was already quite a bit of clamour. Thor had them all stop and wait as Thor made his announcement and, who Rose could only assume was Odin, called out for silence and then they were introduced all by name by Thor.

“Friends! It gladdens me this day, for my brother has returned to Asgard. Might I introduce Loki and his soon-to-be bride, Rose Tyler of Midgard!”

Rose had not expected an applause but there was, a rather loud one though she was unsure if it was out of joy or obligation, but once she stepped out with Loki, her arm in his, she couldn’t help but smile at the expressions that crossed their faces. 

A proud smile flashed across Loki’s face to see the open stares of the people in the hall. Whatever they expected for his return or of his bride-to-be, they had not expected this. He was now the envy of nearly every man in the room to have such a gorgeous woman at his side. At last he found himself confident, walking forward without hesitation toward his once Father and Mother on the far end of the hall where they were seated.

Their friends were announced as well: “The Doctor and his companion Lady Donna the Noble! The Lady Martha Jones! The Father and Mother of the Bride, Lord Peter and Lady Jacqueline Tyler, the brother of Lady Rose, young master Tony...and these, dear friends...are my nieces and nephew...Eirik, Eira, and Susi...”

The crowd seemed awed by the children, and Thor more so, Rose was glad to see; her sights however lay before her. Odin and Frigga were ahead of them, most regal and nearly frightening but she held her head up, keeping pace with Loki. When they stopped before them, the Queen smiled gently down at them but Odin, with his one eye, remained stern in appearance. 

“My son...” Odin started, and Rose could feel Loki tense up at her side, “...for a long time I did not think I would find you here again.”

“I...did not expect to ever return. I assumed it was...for the best.” He answered, keeping his tone even and level.

“You escaped to your Midgard.”

“I exiled myself.”

“For this woman,” Odin said, regarding her with his one stern eye.

Rose’s eye narrowed ever so slightly at this man, now understanding the origin of several of Loki’s problems.

“For her, yes.” Here, Loki looked at her full of love and pride, running a hand over hers as it rested in the crook of his arm, and smiled. “Always for her.”

Rose beamed at Loki and glanced back at the two who had claimed to be his parents. Odin seemed a bit stunned but quickly reverted to a rather severe stare but Frigga was smiling softly down at them both.

“You have caused great damage, Loki. To Asgard. To Midgard. All for the sake of what you wanted.” Odin continued, his tone still stern and nearly accusatory. Rose saw Frigga give her husband a measured glare. No doubt she’d had a discussion with him moments before and he was choosing to ignore it.

“Forgive me,” Rose started carefully, speaking up and releasing Loki’s arm, stepping closer to the God and Goddess. “...but all he wanted was to be treated right. Yeah, he did wrong, he knows he did wrong but do ya think it was easy for ‘im? You can’t go an’ blame him for bein’ upset for bein’ lied to his whole life. For findin’ out what he did. That would have messed anyone up. An’ what do you do at the end of it? He was ready to die, an’ he nearly did.” 

Rose could feel the emotion boil up inside of her, tired of this so-called God as he sat up on his throne looking down at them. A man who, as she learned, had cast out one son for disobedience and lied to another and allowed him to fall to what could have been his death. “I was the one who found ‘im and picked up the pieces of what was left broken. The way he was treated drove him to that. He was ready to die an’ I saved ‘im. Yet you place all blame on ‘im. You are a bully.”

The entire room gasped at her accusations and yet no one moved and Odin didn’t even blink. Rose knew she shouldn’t be having a go at what could possibly be her father-in-law but if they weren’t wanted here and if this man was simple going to talk down to her soon-to-be husband, then she was not going to hold back.

“You lied to ‘im his whole life. You might have thought you were protectin’ him and being kind but imagine learnin’ you are what you were brought up to fear? You lied to him about everythin’ though. He always felt left behind. No, he should not have done what he did but he has come to terms with that. You should too if you claim yourself to be any sort of father. Bein’ a parent means to love unconditionally!”

She felt Loki coming up to hold her hand tightly in his, it was only then she realized she was shaking. Rose squeezed his hand in return and took a deep breath. “As for what he did to New York...I am partly to blame for that. I left ‘im. I hurt ‘im...and I have regretted that ever since.” She swallowed back the lump in her throat. “I love him. Loki is kind an’ lovin’ an’ he is a good father. We are a family. If you don’t approve of us, we’ll just go back an’ be married there but we came here on your invitation...” she faltered slightly, not knowing how to finish her sentence but the silence was soon broken by Odin.

“You are bold, Rose Tyler of Midgard. And passionate. You are very much the warrior. I can respect that.” He turned to Loki and stared for a long silent moment, the entire hall seemed to be holding its breath as they waited. “I...have been an old fool. Stubborn to the last and let myself be blinded by the very things I often warned against. I hope you all will stay...and I hope you can forgive me in time...my son.” The last part was spoken in a near whisper and an almost imperceptible smile crossed the old man’s face. “You found quite the woman,” he added before sitting straighter in his seat, welcoming them all and signaling the feast to start.

The rest of the night was spent laughing and eating and dancing and mingling. Rose got to know Frigga well, a kind and more regal woman Rose had never met and she spent a good hour talking with her as they gathered around the triplets that the Queen just had to coo over. “They will be strong and happy children,” the woman had promised, “though quite the handful if they are anything like their father.”

Jackie retired early with the triplets and Pete followed soon after with Tony, leaving the others to the remainder of the feast. Rose danced with Loki and his brother and all of their friends, though Valstagg was thoroughly drunk by this time but she could not remember laughing so hard. 

As the night came to a close and following old tradition, Loki went to spend the night in his old room while Rose shared one with Martha. It was late but Rose found herself almost too excited to sleep.

“Nervous?” Martha asked. 

Rose, now in her nightgown—an actual gown that had been provided—seated herself on the bed. “A bit...you grow up dreamin’ of stuff like this an’ bein’ a princess...but you never actually expect it to happen. I still didn’t. An’ now we’re here,” she flung herself backward on the bed, “An’ I thought whatever weddin’ mum through was going to be too much but now I got a bleedin’ Queen an’ Goddess throwin’ me a weddin’!”

Martha laughed, joining her, “Don’t forget...she’s goin’ to be your mum-in-law.”

“That’s terrifyin’! Talk about pressure.”

“She liked you though. Seemed like you got on well enough, yeah?”

“Yeah, she’s loads nicer than ‘er husband.”

“I can’t believe you told ‘im off like that! You shoulda seen everyone’s faces! I was too terrified to laugh, though. I bet he’s not used to people tellin’ ‘im ‘no’. You are amazin’.”

“You woulda done the same. I bet my mum woulda slapped ‘im!”

“Your dad was actually holdin’ ‘er back! I woulda paid to see your mum slap a God.”

“Yeah...guess we should get some sleep though. Long day tomorrow,” Rose moved, climbing under the covers, “Thanks for stayin’ with me. You’re a good friend, Martha.”

“No problem, Rose. Blimey, in a place like this, you need someone with you in case you get lost!”

Martha was fast asleep while Rose lay staring up at the velvety canopy of their bed as the warm light of Asgard streamed in through the open window. She smiled to herself at how well the evening had gone and closed her eyes. “G’night, Loki,” she whispered, dropping off to sleep.


	9. Always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki and Rose finally marry and their party is interrupted by an unforeseen guest that brings unexpected tidings and a glad conclusion.

It was difficult to properly describe the grandeur of the wedding that followed the next morning, nor could the amount of activity that flooded into the girls’ room that morning.

Attendants were sent in the next morning to get the girls ready, bringing trays of fruit and armfuls of linens as they ushered the girls out of bed. Rose and Martha nibbled on the fresh fruit as the ladies bustled about measuring the pair of them as they ate, holding up different measures of fabric against them as they fussed about designs. Both of them were literally stitched into their gowns, the attendants hemming and adjusting the lengths tirelessly as the pair of them stood there. 

Donna and Jackie soon joined them, followed by the women who had been assigned to their own gowns. The entire bedroom was quickly turned into the dressing and prep area, the four women standing there being fussed over. Rose had to admit it was a bit much but who was she to go off complaining to a Queen –her soon-to-be mother-in-law, she reminded herself—when she had gone through all this trouble to get them here and to prepare them a wedding. 

It was exciting and exhausting; magnificent and over the top. It made her anxious and giddy all at once and it was everything she never thought she could hope for. Martha, looked just as flustered by all the attention but Donna and Jackie seemed to be enjoying the treatment.

“I feel like a right goddess, ya know?” Jackie said smiling, almost turning to direct the ladies and asking for pink but Rose soon talked her down from that. If she let her mother decide on what had to be done, they weren’t likely to make it to the wedding on time.

Before long, they were ready; all of them standing there like women out of time and they truly were. Both Martha and Donna were fitted into long purple gowns with silver accents and jewelry trimmed with diamonds. Jackie was fit into a teal coloured gown with navy trim—despite her insistence that everything be pink—, all her jewelry also silver and diamond.

Rose received the most care. The attendants hemmed her carefully into a cream-coloured gown of the most exquisite silk and lace, with a long sweeping train; lacy sleeves hugged her arms while another layer of silk fell open at the elbow, the inner layer completely gold satin. Every inch of her bodice was etched intricately with swirling gold stitching, hugging her every curve. Once more she wore gold and emerald jewelry. A choker of latticed gold laced her neck and spilled over her collar bone, each joint touched with a singularly small diamond and one larger emerald sat centered. Her earrings were thin strings of gold, the studs solid emerald. Her hair was pulled up slightly at the sides, held up with diamond studded clips, the rest of her hair falling in waves and curls.

For once, Jackie was stunned into silence, her hands held as though in prayer over her lips, her eyes misted with tears. Donna and Martha smiled at her, each of them on the verge of tears already as they complimented her, giving her words of encouragement.

The moment had come.

Hauntingly beautiful music echoed off the walls as they made their way down the hall, surrounded by ladies in waiting dressed in gowns of every color, each pale and soft so as not to overwhelm her importance in this ceremony. Each of them clutched baskets filled with rose petals: pink and red and white and yellow. 

Jackie walked ahead of her, the triplets in a beautiful golden carriage that seemed to have been made expressly for them. All three were dressed neatly: Eirik put in a lovely green and black outfit that seemed appropriate to small boys of Asgard to wear and the girls, Eira and Susi, put into little white and green dresses.

As their procession moved along, her father and the Doctor soon joined them. Pete was dressed in something that seemed somewhere between suit and armor of black and blue that suited him; she knew full on armor would not have looked right on him and those that had dressed him seemed to feel the same. The Doctor, however was dressed...as the Doctor. He had traded his blue suit in for the one she had known and loved: pinstriped and long brown coat. She wondered when he had gotten ahold of the duplicate, especially here...unless he had expressly asked the attendants to design it for him. She would not be surprised.

The music grew louder as they neared the Great Hall. Rose’s heart sped up in excitement, tears welling in her eyes, knowing what was coming. It was all she could do to not fly apart at the seams, so overwhelmed with the feeling of joy and love that she was shaking. Martha took one of her hands, smiling at her and murmuring encouragement to her. The Doctor pulled the bouquet of white roses from her with one hand, and grabbed hers with his free one, giving it a gentle squeeze of reassurance.

“You’ll be fine, Rose,” he said, a happy and almost sad smile on his face. There was still undeniable love there but he loved her enough to know to let go, wanting her to be happy above all else and she couldn’t thank him enough for this. She squeezed his hand in return, allowing him and Martha to lead her forward.

They were met at the entrance by Fandral—if she remembered his name correctly, a flirt that reminded her so much of Jack that he made her smile—dressed exquisitely in all shades of blue and sapphire. He smiled broadly at the procession and bowed to her (and all the ladies in the room).

“I am to announce you,” he said without preamble. “And then half the flower girls will lead the way, followed by Missus Tyler and the little ones. Then...ah there you are!” He announced delightedly as Thor emerged in his full armor of scarlet and gold. Thor smiled at all of them. “As I was saying,” Fandral continued, “After the mother of the lovely Lady Rose goes out with the babes, I shall follow with Miss...Martha, correct? And Thor shall escort the Lady Donna—”

“What about the Doctor?” Rose asked in surprise, she wanted all her friends to be a part of this and he was such a big part of her life.

“Rose,” he said with that small smile of his, “It’s what I wanted,” he promised, “besides! I’m rubbish at weddings, don’t want me as part of one, I’ll never shut up!” 

He laughed and smiled brilliantly as only he knew how but as their eyes met she knew he was still a little conflicted and could not bring himself to assist in marrying her off. She understood that. He kissed her cheek and hugged her tight. 

“Be happy ...for me. Can you do that, Rose Tyler?” He whispered the question and it nearly brought her to tears again.

“Yeah, promise,” she agreed.

He pulled away and handed her the bouquet ad smiled. “I’ll go take my seat.” With that, he left.

Fandral finished explaining the process that was to come and Rose nodding anticipation though she hardly heard him. The flower girls went out, followed by Jackie who was already crying, then Martha and Fandral went out, followed by Donna who couldn’t help but smile up at Thor. Rose couldn’t help but laugh to herself about Donna and her constant eying of handsome men; it relaxed her a moment before her father offered his arm to her, ready to lead her out while the other flower girls followed.

A sense of awe and peace fell over her as she entered the room. It seemed so much more ethereal now than it had before, everything seeming to be aglow; it was golden and bright and magnificent. All eyes were turned on her in awe but there was only one set of eyes she cared about and she met them.

At the far corner end of the room, standing before the steps of the throne of Asgard, was Loki in his armor—so like before but new and shining—he looked truly like a prince now and the look on his face was full of love and adoration, a soft warm smile on his lips. She beamed at him and his smile grew.

His heart quickened at the sight of her. She had entered this room yesterday at his side looking like a warrior, beautiful and dangerous and ready to fight because that’s what he had feared would come of his entrance back in Asgard but now...now she was an angel and a goddess, the most pure being in this room and all were in awe of her. 

She seemed to glow, radiating warmth and sunlight and pure love, and he wasn’t sure if it was just the golden light of the room or merely the immense love he had for her that made her shine like some sacred being. All eyes watched her, every single person in Asgard was on their feet and most bowed in her direction, even Odin had left his thrown to stand in wait for her. Rose was the most important woman in the room—in all of Asgard, in the whole of creation really—today, and he was the luckiest god... monster... being... man knowing that she was making her way her to his side to be joined with him for the rest of time.

Loki felt his brother’s hand rest on his shoulder, giving him a solid pat in show of support and love and congratulations. He and Thor had spoken at length the night before when they had left the banquet. Reconciling differences and overcoming hurt. Thor did most of the apologizing though Loki soon found himself in tears and expressing the regret that had coiled in his stomach for so long. His brother had hugged him then and smiled and once again he felt finally at home and today, his brother was at his side for one of the most important days of his life.

Rose was at his side after what felt like an eternity of waiting, kissed and handed over by her father and she took his arm. Odin initiated the ceremony, speaking of lifelong trials and tradition and family and companionship. The words were old and sacred, echoing throughout the Hall, resonating through them as they stood and were bound by the old blessings. They spoke their oaths to each other, their hearts flooding with emotion as the ceremony played out.

At long last, the Allfather gave his blessing and at last they kissed, man and woman...husband and wife...god and goddess...lovers eternal. 

Amidst cheers, Odin leaned toward them and spoke words neither thought they would hear. “I can restore what I took from you,” he said, so seriously that neither of them blinked.  
Loki looked at his father—for that’s what he was and who he would always be despite it all—and was in such awe he could hardly fathom the words to speak...but then the answer came so easily to him. “No.”

“No?” 

“I have chosen my path,” he answered firmly, “This is the one I want. With Rose. For as long as we live. Mortal.” Some time ago, he may have chosen elsewise—in fact he was certain he would have gladly taken back all the power once stripped from him. He had been so lost without it...but now and forever there was Rose, his family, and that’s all he needed; it was all he wanted.

“Very well...i am proud of you, Loki...and I am happy for both of you.”

~~~

There was a banquet, as ever; somehow even more grand than the night before. There was dancing and drinking and laughter. The happy couple and their friends and family gathered around them in celebration. They spoke with everyone and Rose danced, too exhilarated to ever stop. With Loki. With her father, With Fandral and Valstagg and Thor. She danced with Doctor as they reminisced over their first dance and laughed like old friends. The night was spectacular—

That’s when she heard it. When everyone in the hall heard it. The music fell silent and the grinding and whirring of a sound of which had not been heard in years and was never expected to be heard here.

Then there it was.

Almost smack dab in the middle of the hall was the TARDIS. The proper one. Not that there was a problem with the green TARDIS, she was lovely inside and out. This one, however, had been home to two of them. It seemed bluer than Rose remembered; somehow brighter and newer.

Out stumbled a man in a tweed coat and bow tie followed by a woman with the curliest hair that anyone had ever seen.

“Where are we then? I thought we were going to have a picnic.” The woman demanded looking around.

The man froze, “Well, wherever we are it seems we’ve just gate-crashed a party. Hello!” The man said, waving awkwardly, “So sorry about this.”

The Doctor, pinstriped and curious approached the pair, his hand first touching the blue box in reverence, “Hello, old girl.”

The man in the bow-tie turned in shock toward him, “You...but I don’t remember...oh...did I somehow...?” He seemed at a loss for words, something that the pinstriped Doctor found highly amusing.

“Nah!” He said with a smile and a laugh, “No holes ripped in the universe! Honest! By the way, the TARDIS is full grown. I see you’ve redecorated, too! And I changed my face then. How many times now I wonder? Can’t be too many. Only got so many faces and I don’t remember this one.”

The bow-tied Doctor smiled and suddenly laughed, “Only the one time since...oh! I see you found a Donna!” He beamed though there was a bit of a hitch to his smile. “And a Martha! Perfect!” He exclaimed, reaching out to shake each of their hands though both looked visibly confused.

“What’s all this then? What’s goin’ on here?” Asked Jackie, marching up to the little crowd as everyone else looked on in shock. “Who’re you? An’ what’s the TARDIS doin’ ‘ere? An’ where is he? I’d like to give ‘im a smack for old time’s sake!”

The new Doctor frowned suddenly, “Jackie...hello. It’s me! Though, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t slap me. River does enough of that,” he added, thumbing at the curly-haired companion at his side who beamed.

“Good, someone oughtta, the way you left things...”

He fidgeted a moment and then shrugged it off, “So, I guess I’ve just crashed a party...where are we? And how did you all get here?” He glanced at his metacrisis for answers.

The pinstriped Doctor smiled somewhat sadly but pressed on with explanations as he always did. “We came via the Bifrost...oh, I like sayin’ that, ‘via the Bifrost’, gonna use that now! As I was sayin’ we slipped though via the Bifrost. We’re in Asgard!”

This startled the new Doctor visibly. If they were in Asgard, did that mean—? On cue, Loki appeared before them, a light scowl fell over his features.

“Loki...you are back.”

“You just landed in the middle of my wedding feast,” he said, obviously irate with the man’s presence.

“Goodness, did i?”

River laughed, “We’ve gate-crashed a God’s wedding! That is definitely going in the journal.”

The Doctor smiled but only half-heartedly, “River, Loki....Loki, River.”

“Loki? God of Mischief? THE Loki? Really?”

“Yes.” Loki answered, half glaring at the woman.

“Is it true, about your kids then?”

“Is what true?” He asked, apprehensive, “they are but half a year old.”

“You mothered them then, the horse, right?” She asked.

Loki took a step back, affronted, “Excuse me?”

“Sleipnir, right?”

“Madame, that is a mere horse and not mine and certainly not my child.”

“River, that’s enough.”

“But the legends...”

“Are but legends, woman,” Loki growled, “How many legends and histories and been rewritten and bastardized over time? The mere depictions of them are but symbols and nothing more.”

“She meant nothing by it, Loki.” The new Doctor assured the God hesitantly. Given how things had ended between them the last time they met, he knew he couldn’t expect the God to have any sympathy towards either of them.

“Leave it to you and your companion to come insult me on the day of my wedding...on the day I marry the one woman you loved and...” he didn’t finish his sentence, fighting back the anger that had once surged there. Loki did not need to care, it did not matter; Rose was with him, now and forever.

It seemed in all of the excitement of old faces, that the Doctor had over-looked the most important one—and perhaps he had tried to, not wanting to believe that things had not worked between her and himself...his other self. He didn’t want to think about her being here, about seeing her after all this time, after he had just started a new life. The ache was still there, dulled by fresher memories but ever present.

It was then that Rose stepped forward. She had been cautious seeing that box. She never thought she’d see it again; never thought she’d be so calm about it. Once upon a time she used to be excited at the sight of it, loved it; it had been her home and her salvation but now she was calm. The man standing there was so different...the bow-tie, the tweed, the suspenders; his face and his hair so new and different and the eyes had changed color again...but as their gaze met, she knew him at once and completely. A man who had been her friend, a man she had loved. It was there still but not the same. 

“Hello...Rose Tyler,” he said, her name rolling off his tongue, familiar and yet new.

“Doctor...” she said slowly, the other one turning away to admire the new TARDIS instead.

“I’m sorry.” He said, his smile now gone.

“Don’t be...’m not,” she insisted.

“I still...”

Rose glanced at Loki and then approached the new Doctor, pulling him into a hug that he couldn’t help but return, pulling her tight as an old feeling washed over him. “You never have to apologize, not to me. Not ever.”

He smiled into her hair and hoped River would forgive him. He had lost Rose more than once and he was going to give her a proper goodbye. “As long as you are happy.”

“I am,” she promised.

“I never got to say it,” he whispered.

“I knew...i always knew...”

His smile grew along with the sadness but he could find no words to say. He would not say them now, their time had come and gone and they both at last had moved on.

He pulled out of the hug suddenly, "Rose Tyler, wife of a God...suits you, if I’m honest with myself. Never stood a chance, me,” he joked, throwing on that smile of his, new and different and exactly the same as always.

Rose stepped back to stand beside her now husband who looped an arm around her protectively. She gave him her warmest smile and felt his muscles relax all at once. He had nothing to fear here. 

“I’ve got my own—” He started again, only to be smacked in the arm by the woman beside him. He held his arm but smiled, “This is River, my...er...wife, I think, did that count?” He glanced at River. “I was a teselecta at the time.”

Everyone raised an eyebrow at this and River was quick once more to slap his arm and roll her eyes. “And babies, what’s this I hear about babies? Rose Tyler, are you a mum?”

At this Rose and Loki beamed at each other and Jackie was quick to bring them around. Introductions were made and congratulations given, the entire group somehow apart from the whole of Asgard though the Lords and Ladies and Gods watched on curiously without interrupting. It was a strange reunion though the awkwardness soon melted away as the banquet continued and was replaced by a warm acceptance.

“I think we should get going,” the new Doctor said at last. “You have the rest of your wedding to celebrate...”

“Darn, I was hoping for another waltz with the God of Thunder over there.” River joked.

“Stay,” Rose insisted though she knew the response that would soon follow.

The Doctor smiled, “No...i think it’s time for a proper goodbye this time.”

Rose nodded and they hugged for the final time, tightly, the last of what they had spoken silently with their limbs instead of their mouths. When they separated it was done and they were both, at last, in agreement. 

He beamed at her. “Goodbye, Rose Tyler...you were brilliant!”

“Goodbye, Doctor, go save the universe.”

The Doctor held a hand out toward Loki and for a moment the fallen god didn’t move but just before the tension mounted, he met the Time Lord’s hand and shook it firmly and they smiled respectfully at each other.

“Take good care of her,” he said.

Loki nodded, “Always.”

The pair waved at the rest as they climbed back aboard the TARDIS and this time, arm in arm with her husband, Rose was content and even happy to see the blue box disappear from view and the glorious sound to fade.

Rose turned to look up at the man at her side, smiling lovingly back down at her, content and unburdened and happy. This was the journey she had always waited for, the one that had waited for her all these years. 

Loki could not look away. He had found happiness and, at long last, peace. Everything, once lost, had been comeback into his life and Rose was at his side. The one adventure he never dreamed he could have, made a reality. They were together, now and forever.


	10. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fifteen years has passed and their lives has continued but something has happened and in the course of it new questions to be answered, paving the way for a new future.

It happened the way these things always do. All of a sudden, without warning, at the most unexpected time on the most normal and boring of days.

Fifteen blissful years had passed. Rose and Loki pretty much ran Torchwood now, for Pete—not too terribly old still but old enough to know he couldn’t be in the ‘game’ much anymore—had retired for the most part. They were good and fair and careful in how they handled their affairs. Often they took a holiday, one often prompted by the Doctor and his own wife, Georgia—someone he said reminded him an awful lot of someone he once knew named Romana.

They went off on usually safe adventures with the occasional hitch and a sudden bout or world saving was required. The children started traveling with them three years ago and all helped pilot the green TARDIS. Donna occasionally joined them with her new husband, Bruce, though she was immensely enjoying the prospect of starting her own family. Martha was extremely busy with being a doctor and was currently engaged to another, only sometimes swanning off with them all. The Doctor was enjoying having his TARDIS so full.

The life of Rose Tyler and Loki was an adventurous one. They fought, the way couples do but always settled things. They were warm and passionate and more in love than they ever were. Whenever they felt like it, they’d drop the triplets off to stay with Jackie and their uncle Tony and run off for a romantic and free evening or weekend together.

Sometimes they visited Asgard, to which they were always treated to some feast or another. The Aesir really enjoyed parties, Rose decided, as she could not remember ever seeing them otherwise. Loki, however, enjoyed dragging her off to the vast library where he used to come as a boy, showing her all the secret niches where he hid himself to be alone with his books and his thoughts, as he had never truly been one for the enjoyment of battle the way everyone else was. He would take her and the kids exploring and picnicking with Thor occasionally joining them; and when it was just the two of them, they would spend some quiet moments surrounded by books in the library as he reminisced.

Their life was soon interrupted by the inevitable. 

Rose was going over some rather tedious paperwork when she got the call, “This is Rose Tyler...”

There was hesitation at the other end of the line, “Mum...?”

Rose sat straighter, “Eira? What’s wrong?”

Her daughter sounded visibly shaken, “I...we were out with friends....um...” Eira’s voice wavered, “There was...something there in the theater...Danny...he wanted to mess ‘round with Steph an’ they snuck off. We all heard a scream and everyone panicked. Eirik ran after the sound and then we heard him yell...” Rose’s heart stopped, standing so fast that her chair toppled behind her. Her daughter sobbing now. “An’ me and Susi ran after him and then we saw....there was so much blood, mum! I...Danny and Steph...” Eira was crying heavily now.

“Mum?” Eirik had taken the phone and the breath she’d been holding released but she was on edge, waiting.

“Eirik, what happened?” 

Loki had just entered her office, looking alarmed as she asked the question.

“They’re dead,” he said stiffly, his voice tightening. “Something...it got them and i...i fought it off...i may have killed it...but...”

Something in his voice terrified her, her hand clutched the phone so tight she thought it would shatter. “What...?”

“Mum...i’m...i made it...freeze. I...we’re...Susi and Eira too...what are we, mum?”

Tears pricked her eyes, “Where are you? We’ll come get you, okay? We’ll take you home and...we’ll explain...”

She heard the tentative agreement and listened to where they three of them were hiding and then hung up. Her eyes met her husband’s and he knew without doubt what had happened. He swallowed.

They left Torchwood quickly, making their way towards the alley behind the theater. The triplets stood there, blue-skinned, red eyed, holding each other worriedly. Just as they were steering them towards the car Rose was knocked to the ground by something entirely not human, somewhere a cross between a monster and what Rose would call a cyborg. 

There was skin and metal and dirt and blood. Doubtless this was the thing responsible for the murder of their friends, this or another like it. More converged on the family, snarling their pointed teeth at them , the triplets, despite being afraid all took a stance like little blue warriors, all unsure of they had it in them; Eirik especially looked as though he wondered if he could pull off the same stunt from before. Loki was ready to charge to help Rose but three of these creatures converged on him. The one hovering over Rose looked ready to bite into her—

—that’s when it happened.

Rose felt a warm glow in the center of her chest and then at the back of her mind and suddenly she was aglow. The Bad Wolf had reawakened, flinging the alien beast off her. Loki, who had barreled through the three creatures to aide his wife, emerged bloody fisted and blue, icy rage burning though him. Understanding what had happened, he duplicated himself to fight, one of his duplicates moving the children to safety while the rest fought. 

Together, he and Rose battled, freezing and blasting the beasts one by one until it was done. They stood there for a moment, collecting their thoughts. Loki was one man again, the blue faded and the glow had left Rose just as quickly, though she could feel it, curled warmly at her center.

They looked at each other in shock. Both knew of what the other had been capable of. He had told and even shown her his tricks long ago and Rose had recalled the tale of the Bad Wolf. It had merely lain dormant, it seemed; the power no longer burning her, as the Doctor had saved her from that—but she was something new and now Loki inexplicably had his powers returned to him.

“We should tell them,” he said, nodding at their children as they stood waiting and staring at them.

“Yes,” Rose agreed.

A few silent beats later: “What happens next?”

Rose smiled broadly, “I don’t know...an’ I can’t wait to find out.”


End file.
